Chapter 3
2007.06.26. 09:30
Chapter-III.
The following two days came unnoticable for me one after the other.
I was lost in time and space, I was in and out of counsciousness fighting with extreme high fever.
David told me later he felt as helpless as I did before. He found me laying in the snow only a mile away from the spot I left him. He waited for me a while, but after he'd seen the blizzard coming he hesitated no more. He followed my trail before the storm would have cleansed them away.
He slept, ate some snow from his hands, found a muesli bar in his pocket and saved me.
By the time he reached me my communication wasn't coherent, I had hallucinations and was crying in terror, he said he was under the impression I was fighting with death itself.
It could have been so, who knows it.
He knew we would have to get a safe place to stay, he made a makeshift sledge from branches and the rope, he found with me, he dragged me along to the jeep and laid me down covering me with the blanket.
After, he went back for the things I collected and brought those back, too and he put everything inside the car.
He also had a rather unpleasent experience because he found the keys of the car in the deadman's pocket under the jeep, it was one of his roadies. He said he tried to close his eyes, but he couldn't as the body was very rigid.
It kept disturbing him, I didn't know before but he was a newborn Christian and believed in God firmly.
He started the engine so we were kept warm.
He tried the radio, but there was only static noises, these snowcapped mountains were so high, we were right under Mount Cook and it is more than 12000. feet high, they shadowed the receiving completely, we weren't able to send message and weren't able to recieve one, we were trapped.
Dave found his cell in my pockets, too.
Tried everything he could have thought of, but it was useless.
After I regained counsciousness I was flabbergasted by his inventive genious, maybe he also knew about Ray Smears.
He went into his trailer and made tea, he melted snow and boiled water above the working engine of the jeep in the metal box of the airfilter. He also made a quick soup from the things he could put his hands on, I don't remember the details, only that it was salty. Maybe he was watching Jamie Oliver, too.
He collected gas from the other three cars he found into jerry cans so we would have continous heating in the car.
Gathering equipments from all around the area helped him spend the days I spent comatose, almost.
He made a bonfire to help rescuers to find us, but either they didn't know the exact spot of filming or the terrible weather prevented them from searching, they haven't found us.
Not yet, I hoped.
Three and a half day already passed, maybe they think we are all dead.
He didn't enjoy the silence either.
Also been worried upon a possible avalanche, we were right in harms way, exactly in the middle of it.
After two days I began feeling myself better, my temperature lowered and I could breathe more easily.
I tried to help David but he didn't let me. I was watching him buzzing around with endless energy, he really is undestructible. He lost weight, had stubble of four days on his face, but it made his face even more caracteristic.
I stiched his wound with the medical equipment we found in the first aid kit, I should have done it well before this time, the edges of the cut were a bit purple and not red anymore, it can be that he would wear the scar in his entire life.
And what was more than a small wonder all our hands and feet and noses and ears were all right, none were frozen and wounded.
Good news as my hands and feet grew to me, literally( haha)
The space in the car was rather small, but I just liked it this way, spending the whole night in his arms.
But no one should think it was very romantic, I was sure I was stinking.
I couldn't change my clothes for four days, been ill, been sweating and all.
Mind you, he hadn't complained.
Nor me, I liked the smell of his sweat, I still think he smelled great.
What other things I remember?
The talking, he kept talking while I was between life and deadth to tie me to this world and not let me step into the other.
He told me when I was well again that he was talking all night long in fear I would die, so he was talking for two entire days and only ocasionally dozed off a while, when he wasn't able to talk more he was singing to me, when he was too tired he was just humming the tunes.
He said he would have gone nuts alone in the wilderness only a couple of dead people for keeping him company.
He was so afraid to lose the last living soul around him.
I'm so sorry I can't remember anything of these moments, shouldn't I bang my head into some tree? He was speaking just for me, he was singing just for me and I am not able to remember it.
It is the clear case when something is given for you and it's taken away from you in the same moment.
I felt I shouldn't be here with him, we live in two separate worlds, we are two lines which meant to meet only in eternal infinity and not here and now.
We were very different.
I felt quite sad. He must have sensed it and tried to cheer me up with his jokes, some were really lame, but I loved them none the less.
I was desperate, I felt no one would come for us and we would just die here and later they will find our decaying bodies like they found Mallory's after some seventy years on a slope of Csomolungma.
I wasn't happy that I could spend entire days with my one and only hero. I waited for 22years and now I'm just crying, though not in dissapointment.
I don't know ,maybe now, that he is by my side I realised how unreachable he is and I'm saying this after spending not one night close to him, in his arms, even if it's happened only because of the avalanche.
He was kind and charming and affectionate, but closed for me, or so I felt.
I realised it is not right for me wanting him, morally, I mean, we both have families, responsibilities, and the one and most important rule in Buddhism, of which I am a follower or like to think so, the Ahimsa, not to hurt anyone, neither phisically nor emotionally.
And it would hurt more than one person including ourselves.
Never mind that he was the first man in my pinky, girly world of 14years and I feel him within my mind eversince.
He was the very first I wanted, so he should be the last before I die, I thought.
Why I make a problem of it I don't know, he is not wanting me at all.
Or so I thought.
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