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Chapter 35
2009.08.12. 15:12
35.
Martin sneaked in without knocking. As he spotted us he said: “You know Mia, I’ve seen Dave with some women, but none of them was laughing this hard when he put his cock into her hand.”
“Hey, Mart, don’t be so vulgar!” Dave laughed too.
“I’m not vulgar, but horny. Come… oh I see, you can’t come so then I go…” and he stepped behind his back and nuzzled to him. Our panther closed his eyes from his joy. “David, my love” Mart breathed into his ear “we’d decided with Mia that tonight we’ll pamper, love and adore just you. We’re your slaves, my god” he licked a spot behind Dave’s ear and he breathed on the skin with his hot lips. Dave was just moaning loudly.
“Dave, tell us what you want. We do anything for you” I said as I slid his treasure out of my mouth for a moment.
“I’ve told you that you’re like drug for me! I want more and more from you. Ahh Mart, Martin, jeeesus, Mart…” Now the experienced musician was the impatient one. “I love you both” he sighed.
“We love you too Dave, we love you too” I answered unbuttoning his shirt and I gave kisses onto his revealed soft skin after every button. Martin walked around the couch and took Sir Lefty into his hand. I still had to laugh from this nickname. I left a wet trail with my tongue on his chest then I licked along his Ohm-tattoo excitingly slowly then I did the same on his phoenix too. He moaned and I knew that he was getting bigger and harder between Martin’s fingers and lips. I felt him grabbing my hair with one hand and he did the same with Martin’s hair with his other hand. I felt under my lips that his pulse started to race. I licked along his throat until I reached his jaw-line. First I kissed it along then I offered my mouth. And he was kissing me, holding my neck with one hand and he pulled me to him. It was clear how happy he was that we loved him this way. He was shining, but not just his face, but his whole body. A strange light was radiating from him – I swear I saw it – it was like the sun. He gave us his shine and I felt that he brightened me up.
Mart looked up at our desire’s mysterious matter and asked again: “Please tell me David what you want. This is your night, dear, ask anything!”
“Just… love me! Let me feel it!” he stroked Curly’s face, who smiled from this.
“I think it won’t be a problem” he noted and I was just smiling and bent back to Dave’s lips. When I touched him I felt Dave’s hot energy flowing into me. My heart nearly skipped a beat from this. It took my breath away and I moaned into the kiss. He was moaning because Martin took his rock-hard cock into his mouth again.
“Hey, Marty, slower, or else I… jeez Mart, I’ll be over in a sec…”
“Come my dearest Dave, come, I’m waiting for you…”
And Dave cum crying out loud and shaking with his whole body. And Martin swallowed everything he had to give then he started licking Dave’s still hard member. Dave was literally whimpering as he was watching his love licking him clean. Martin stood up and laid David onto the bed.
“Ahh… what’re you up to, Mart?” he moaned digging his fingers into the blonde tufts.
Meanwhile without a word and in a very cooperative way I took off the trousers, boxer, shoes and socks of our exhausted lover. Martin was getting rid off his shirt.
“Aren’t you tired, David? We don’t want to wear you off, honey” Martin asked gently as he lay down next to him.
Dave buried his head into Curly’s shoulder “I’m tired Martin, but I’d die if I couldn’t spend this night with you two. It’s so moving that you love me this much, although… I… don’t think I deserve it.”
“How wouldn’t you deserve it, David? You’re our sun, you keep us alive!” I answered.
Mart’s idea to go to a party was nowhere now… No, we’d rather focus all of our attention on Dave now, who looked at us so gratefully that I couldn’t swallow.
“Dave, don’t look at me like this, or else I’ll cry…” I noted quietly.
“How do I look at you, Mia?”
“Like a lost puppy, who’d found a nice family.”
“I feel exactly like that. You’re able to love me and accept me with all of my ugly mistakes. You love me, your panther and you don’t love my masks and roles, you really love me. You can believe me that this has been rare in my life. And I thank you – I’m awfully grateful for this. As you knocked on my door and fell into my neck… And I know that although you two love each other too, you’re jealous at each other because of me, but you can solve this difficult situation, cuz you know that I love you both very much.”
“The advantages and disadvantages of a love-triangle…” I stroked along his thigh smiling.
“We love you too Dave, you know this well” Martin noted caressing Dave’s face. I had to nod to this.
“Martin, it seems that it’s easier and easier for you to say this to me” he caressed his arm with a smile “A few months or even weeks earlier you didn’t dare to say it…”
“Neither did you. See? Mia has a good effect on us.”
I nuzzled closer to Dave and I started caressing his neck, face and chest. He was enjoying it with a smile on his face and he pulled me even closer to him. Oh god, how good it was being with him!
“I love being with you two…” I whispered in a barely audible voice as I buried my face into his neck with closed eyes and my fingers continued caressing the soft and warm skin of his chest.
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Then my closed eyes had remained closed. I don’t know what they were doing or not. As I was lying between them, I woke up next morning from the sun’s warm beams. Dave was on his tummy – like always. Mart on his side, nearly on his back – like nearly always. I was just watching them as they were sleeping there soundly. Mart was huffing quietly and Dave murmured something in his dream. I smiled – I was rolling in their bodies’ heat and wrapped it around me like a soft and warm blanket. I loved such minutes when just their breathing and the ticking of the clock broke the morning room’s silence. One of my hands was resting on Dave’s back, the other on Mart’s arm, which was hugging me to him by my tummy. I was waiting for them to wake up. I was lying there calmly; it was just disturbing a bit that I had to pee, but I didn’t care. I was sure if I move, they’ll wake up – or at least Martin – so I tried to man myself and I stayed there motionless, feasting my eyes with this amazing sight.
I was feasting and feasting my eyes, but they didn’t want to wake up and I really had to go to the loo. So I’ve decided that I’ll climb out from their embraces, no matter what. As I moved Mart’s hand, he growled in his sleep. He could sleep so alerted. I waited for a minute so he could sink back deeper then I continued climbing off the bed. Well yes, when you must go then you must go… My last steps were hasty then I landed on the porcelain just in time and if I was already there then I’ve decided to have a shower too. When I stepped out from the cabin, someone pushed a towel in my hand. It was Dave – smiling sweetly and yawning – with his free hand he was scratching his tummy.
“I just can’t get enough of you” I laughed into his neck. My breath tickled him, cuz he started giggling on an unlikely tone.
“I’m very, very ticklish there” he squeaked and tried to get free from my embrace.
“Hmmm… really?” my eyes flashed with an evil light “You mean this spot?” I grinned questioningly then I gently breathed onto the ticklish spot. He quickly pulled his shoulders up and tried to suppress his laugh. “Hahaaa! So it’s true!” I gave him a devilish grin again then one of my hands, which were around his neck, found the place and started tickling it.
“Not this way. Just when you do it with your mouth” he pulled me to him and kissed me, embracing my waist tightly. Then he suddenly let go of me “Well it’s time for you to go” he smacked at my butt.
“But Dave…” I protested.
“I can’t pee if you’re standing here, watching me.”
“And? Okay, okay, I go before something bad happens” I giggled.
I quietly got dressed then bent to Martin, who seemed to sleep still. I wanted to give a kiss onto his temple, but he growled and embraced my waist so I had to put my whole weight on him – which wasn’t too much nowadays.
“What are all these clothes on you?” he asked grimly.
“Well Mart… I know that sometimes we three think about things… haha… in a very different way, but usually people wear clothes – especially during daytime.”
“But this early? Why don’t you lay next to me for a little while before you go?” he murmured still on a sleepy voice “Let me smell your scent! It always calms me down.”
“Why are you nervous? You just woke up…” I noted.
“Bad dreams” he shrugged “Hey… come!”
“Okay, but just for a minute. After it you should pull yourself together too, cuz Anton called you at least three times. You’re lucky that it was just on vibrating mode” I climbed back into his arms with my clothes on.
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Mart went back to sleep soon between my arms and Dave came out of the bathroom too “Kitty, I go to run now. Do you want to join me?”
“Are you kidding? Since the wheel was invented I don’t put energy into such things.”
“But it’s good – it releases you from the tension.”
“Are you tense, sweetie?”
“I’m always tense a bit. I’m that nervous kinda guy, you know. I was hyperactive even as a child. I’m full of energy.”
“I saw it last night on the concert. You were amazing.”
“You’re sweet” he leant down and kissed me then he left the room with his long steps, closing the door behind him. There were just the two of us – Mart was sleeping again and I felt that pressure in my head, which never disappeared completely since my last illness. Dave’s right – tension is a bad thing. It’s high time to ease it and this headache too. But not with running, that’s for sure.
I climbed out of the bed and stepped to my bag. I opened my first aid kit, which was full of painkillers – they were from the strong ones, from that kind which doctors use on such patients whose system couldn’t take it anymore and who died and came back like Lazar. I took two pills without any water – I’ve got used to it that I don’t have water with me all the time. I was a bit worried, cuz the prescribed medicines contained morphine. But I always let it pass, cuz after a few minutes the pressure in my head was better and the clench in my chest eased too. Who had pain which was caused by angina knows how fucking scary it can be. And for me, who just came back from death, it was way too much to bear.
Instead of relief – knowing what was waiting for me on the other side – I was fucking scared of death… To ease my distress I took tranquilizers too – next to the painkillers. And before concerts – to stand it better – I took amphetamine too, which animated me. So I knew that what I was doing was dangerous, but knowing that something’s dangerous doesn’t mean that you avoid it cleverly. Sometimes humans are so weak and helpless, they can’t make an effort.
Until now it never crossed my mind that I can get used to the pills, but the day before yesterday David noted that he thinks that I take too much painkillers. And then I realized that he was right. I start and end the day with it. Shit, who cares, I thought. Somehow I must keep up with the tempo of my new life. So I stepped to the table and lifted Mart’s glass to my lips – I knew what was in it. With two or three big sips I took the tranquilizer too. I immediately started to crawl all over and I laid down next to Martin. We had a day off today…
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Dave came back after an hour then he quickly had a shower to wash down the sweat. He was wiping his hair with a towel and he had a little smile on his face as he was watching the sleeping couple. Martin was lying on his side, resting his right arm on Mia’s back, who was sleeping on her stomach as she turned her head towards the window. Dave felt his love for them harder now as he was watching them. The running refreshed him, he was full of energy again. He walked closer to the bed.
As he sank into his thoughts, the smile faded away from his face seeing how pale Mia was. Martin’s hand was resting on her narrow back. Oh god, she’s still so thin… She wasn’t really able to pull herself together since the hospital, he said for himself. He was often thinking about that Mia, whom they got to know, comparing to the one who was with them now. He saw how much she’d changed. He felt sorry, cuz he knew that this life is much more stressful than the previous one she had, but he knew that she had the chance to choose another way. After Copenhagen she had the choice to go home, but she chose them.
He didn’t want to wake them. He was thinking of what to do – after a few moments he picked a T-shirt and jeans and went down to the restaurant to have a nice breakfast. His daily fight had begun. In the elevator one of the two women started staring at him when he stepped in. As he stepped out of the lift and crossed the hall, he felt that some people turned after him and they whispered behind his back. When he sat down and looked up from the menu, he saw that a young couple – a few tables away – were whispering, looking towards his direction time after time.
“I’m glad they haven’t decided to come over and jog me with a stick so they can decide whether I’m real or just a wax statue…” he murmured to himself. He lifted his gaze resignedly onto the waiter, who – thank god – was an older man, who probably had no clue what Depeche Mode was. He was relieved and ordered. He asked for a lot of coffee, croissant, soft-boiled eggs and his favourite: Norwegian salmon, smoked on cold hardwood.
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At the time Dave arrived back, Martin was already dressed up, sitting on the bed and stroking Mia’s back. “I have bad news, Dave” he looked up at him, who immediately glimpsed at Mia “No, not about her” Blondie smiled for a moment.
“Then? Just tell me, don’t spare me.”
“John called a few minutes ago. Although we have a day off, you know that half of the crew have started packing and they’re on their way to Europe.”
“Yes, and?” he walked to his bag to put a few things away. They’ll go to the airport tonight.
“There were some problems by the border and then when they finally arrived to Spain there was an accident on the highway and one of our trucks crashed over.”
“Fuck! Is someone dead?”
“No, no. The windscreen cut the driver’s face, that’s all, but nearly all of the loudspeakers and one of the audio-mixers are busted.”
“Fuck! Fuck! What do we do now?!”
“Poor Andy is already trying to arrange loaning the missing stuffs, but it’s not easy, cuz we’ll need them not just in Spain, but we want to use them around the half of the world.”
“How many days?”
“Thank god, two more days. We have time, don’t make a fuss!”
“Don’t make a fuss? John? Is he suing the guys on that border?”
“No, it wasn’t their fault. And even if the driver is responsible, we can fuck this fact. Relax, it was covered against such accidents.”
“Mart, the sound settings! This is crazy! You know that our technicians had been adjusting them for weeks before the start of the tour to have a perfect sound!”
“Well they’ll have enough work with it now too, that’s for sure.”
“What a nice and calm day off…” Dave noted with a cloudy look as he was crawling in the room “Who the hell wanted such plus stress?!”
“Try to calm down, everything’ll be fine.”
“How do you know, Mart?! Fuck! Why do things like these always happen?!”
“Please Dave, don’t shout at me…” he looked up at him.
“Uhh… alright, I’m sorry. I’m just freaking out from this.”
I came round in a very slowly and sleepy way, hearing Dave’s nervous voice. I think the medicine and booze couple knocked me out for a while, but at least none of my bodyparts hurt now. Except my head.
“Mia, are you alright?” Mart asked with worry in his voice. He saw that his glass, which was full of whisky earlier, was now half-way empty.
“Yeeep” I yawned, feeling still dizzy from the sleep.
Dave was crawling nervously back and forth in the room and he accidentally pushed my bag and it landed on the floor. Everything fell out of it. He automatically bent down to put the things back into it then he suddenly stiffened and stood up with a lot of papers in his hand.
“What’s this, Mia?” he asked on a dark tone.
“What?”
And then he pushed at least 20 recipes under my nose, which I’ve collected for emergency cases, if I’d run out of… I couldn’t answer, cuz he pulled me up and started to shake me by my shoulders.
“What’re you doing? Mia, don’t you see what you’re doing?!” he shouted at me.
“Leave me alone, Dave!” I said, still a bit stuporous, and my head moved slightly forward. It seems that the whiskey for my morning doze was too much “No, don’t hurt me, Dave” I squeaked as he was dragging me into the bathroom. He pulled me in front of him by the washbasin, pressed me to his body, he pulled my head backwards a bit and pushed his toothbrush down my throat. I’ve started vomiting.
“You’re insane!” he hissed meanwhile “What’re you doing? I love you darling, don’t do this! Why’re you doing this?”
I couldn’t answer cuz I was still puking, while my struggle to break free from his strong arms remained useless. From the strain my tears rolled down my face, but instead of protesting I was able just to whimper. After another few spasms I propped myself on the edge of the basing, shaking and felt that my love embraced my body hotly into his and I felt his tears on my neck. He didn’t say a word just breathed raggedly and I felt his body shaking while he was holding me. Meanwhile Martin called our own doctor, who hurried into the bathroom and gave me an injection immediately.
“I’m fine… I’m okay, I’m fine!” I protested stubbornly when they wanted to put me in bed and I really felt myself better a bit “Leave me alone!”
Martin tried to calm me and I saw from the corner of my eyes that Dave was still trying to pull himself together in the bathroom. He wiped his hears away then I barely paid attention to Martin’s silly sentences and I was watching Dave with suspicion in my eyes when he stepped to my bag and with a grossed-out expression he started picking up my meds and tranquilizers.
“What are you doing?!” I shouted at him, nearly jumping out of bed, but Martin grabbed me by my shoulders and held me back “Leave them alone! Those are mine!” I was really frightened that he takes them away. I wasn’t thinking, I was just scared that it’ll hurt again if I have no painkillers.
Dave didn’t say a word just waved with his eyes to Martin to hold me firmly then he went into the bathroom with all of my meds and kicked the door shut behind him. I heard him flush the toilet and heard as he started raging behind the shut door. I heard his muffled cursing and heard as he was kicking the walls and the door with all of his strength. I was so scared that I didn’t even try to get my meds back.
He opened the door and looked at me with anger in his eyes. He stepped to the bed – he wanted to say something – then he just shook his head and left the room. I’ve started crying because he was angry with me and he’d left. Martin tried to calm me but it was useless. I broke fee and fling the door open to run after him. He was standing there next to the door, leaning to the wall.
“Don’t think that after this I’ll leave you alone even for a minute. Or I’ll leave you alone with Mart. Mia, I smelled the whiskey when you were puking, I saw the remains of the pills! Why? We love you!”
“You were loved back then too.”
“That was me. And no, I wasn’t loved like this and I wasn’t able to love like this either as I love you and Martin now. I’ll be always with you, I’ll be your shadow. I don’t care what other people’ll say. My wife already knows about it.”
“WHAAAAT?”
“I haven’t told you. She didn’t say where she’d seen it, but she knew a lot of things… It’s oblivious she knows it. She thinks it’s about the sex. She bowed to it and this isn’t the first time. But she can’t see it clearly. That poor woman has no idea… how much we three have fouled with each other. I fell in love with you. I love Martin. I don’t want and I don’t see a way out of this – we are trapped. In each other’s traps – and we offered our necks willingly. Mia, I swear, I’ll kill myself, if something happens to you! Next time you take pills into your hand remember this.”
I looked at him and I saw… I knew… it was an unbearable feeling to know that he would really do that. I nodded powerlessly, holding on to the doorframe as I bent my head so my matted hair could hide my teary face. I leaned against the wall with my side and slid onto the floor and pulled my legs up. The possibility of loosing Dave paralyzed me completely. He’d really do it because of me.
“Don’t be mad at me…” I whimpered nearly squeaking, but in a very low tone.
“Why did you do this?” he asked nearly on a neutral tone and it didn’t matter that my head was bent, I could feel the weight of his look as he was looking down at me.
“Cuz… cuz it hurts… it still hurts” I breathed and my tears were still flowing. I didn’t know whether he heard it or not, I was just staring at the floor with a glassy gaze.
“What hurts, sweetie?” he sat down next to me on the corridor. The elevator opened and closed, people stepped in or out of it. They were staring at us, but this time Dave really didn’t give a damn, he embraced my shoulders. He didn’t lift his head even when three fans stopped next to us, shaking their heads in disbelief seeing us like this. I saw the line of his jaw hardening from the defiance inside of him, I saw his sad eyes, which knew very well that he can’t step out of the world’s tread-wheel. I saw the ‘I’ll show you’ expression on his now boyish face as he leant to me and kissed me there – paying no attention to anyone but me. He was against anything and everything now. The next day we were in the newspapers.
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