03 - Moondust - part 1
2020.04.25. 20:44
Note: This is the third part of the “Home Is Where the Spark Is” series. To understand better what’s going on, we recommend reading the previous entries. Enjoy!
Fandoms: Teen Wolf, Sterek
Characters/relationships: Stiles Stilinski/Derek Hale
Rating/category: R (explicit), supernatural, post-Teen Wolf, canon and non-canon elements, slash, M/M, Sterek, aged up characters, established friendship, Spark Stiles, Magic Stiles, Emissary Stiles, Emissary in training Stiles, detective Stiles, matured Stiles, Alpha Derek, switch Derek, switch Stiles, drama, epic romance, love, magic, fluff, smut, accidental knotting, soulmates, Mate bond, Emissary bond, werewolves, humor, wit, sarcasm, Derek is Derek, Stiles is Stiles, miscommunication, werewolf lore, mysteries
Summary: When one stops denying what’s meant to be, magical things can happen. And for Derek and Stiles that’s exactly the case after a much needed conversation and a shooting practice in the woods. Also the Camaro gets a significant role in this part.
Disclaimer: This is a product of our imagination and was written only for entertainment and fun. We don’t profit from this fanfiction and we mean no harm or disrespect against any real person, culture or custom that might appear in the story. All original pictures and fictional characters used in the story belong to their respective owners and credit goes to them.
Just Jim edit
Home Is Where the Spark Is
By Just Jim & Useless-girl
3: Moondust – part 1
It has been two days since that moment in the kitchen, two days where they had shared a house and space but there hadn’t been time to talk about what happened. Which of course, had been perfectly timed by Derek to avoid the chances of having to talk about it at all. Even though he had promised himself to stop running, that didn’t mean he was also going to stop avoiding. Because that? That was something he was good at, really good. Stiles wasn’t the only one with the idea that if a problem was ignored long enough, it would go away. It was so much trickier though when said problem was the one and only Stiles himself. Because the human made him feel guilty for avoiding it. Not on purpose, if anything, he was actually more patient than Derek had thought he’d be. But the anxiety was rising, the happiness fading to that sharp ash-like scent of self-hate and depression.
The more Derek avoided the chance of them being alone, the quieter Stiles became. Or at least when the sheriff wasn’t around because they both agreed to pretend around the older man so he wouldn’t worry. A silent agreement they also hadn’t talked about.
They were spending time together – with Beth, with Melissa, with Noah. Just not them without a chaperone. It was ridiculous to use his toddler as a shield but desperate moments asked for desperate measures.
The added stress wasn’t doing him any favors in dealing with the aftermath of Hell either. His nightmares had intensified, two nights of waking up screaming, like he had in the beginning. He was ashamed of that, of having others witness those moments, because it made him feel even more laid bare than he already had been. Stiles hadn’t been the one to comfort him, but he had felt the younger man’s eyes on him from the doorway as Noah had attempted to make sure Derek wasn’t going to claw the bed into shreds, or worse, any of them. It was a sad testament of how used they were to nights like these where he woke up screaming and then had no sleep at all because he was dealing with a distraught daughter. She was incredibly clingy again, afraid to lose him out of her sight because in Hell that had meant bad things would happen to her dad.
At some point though, his shield was gone. Lydia had her for the weekend and even though they were all going to meet up for dinner so Stiles could spend some time with his friend too, it meant there was an entire afternoon free. The timing was slightly off, because Noah was at work and now that Lydia had just picked up her daughter, Derek had to somehow get to his jacket and car keys without running into Stiles. The excuse of needing some parts for his car was a good one in his opinion, but he needed said car. His keys were in the pocket of his jacket, the jacket was on the couch and he was at the front door, having waved goodbye to Beth. And Stiles was... He reached out with his senses, freezing when the heartbeat was right around the corner, nearing, nearing- and then Stiles was right there.
Shit.
For a while Stiles was unaware of Derek trying to avoid being alone with him so they could talk. For a while having Beth and Noah in the same house was a good enough reason not to get suspicious. They acted normal, especially around his dad, but the young detective slowly started picking up on the signs. Derek's closed off expression, his glances at him when he thought Stiles didn't notice, the excuses which often involved taking care of Beth and so on.
The younger man knew what he was doing. Derek Hale was good at trying to avoid the elephant in the room. He was probably already beating himself up about what had happened between them. He was probably already listing the things why it was a bad idea to start anything. Stiles also wouldn't be surprised if Derek already persuaded himself that he simply didn't deserve happiness with him. Because first that's what Stiles felt after they stepped over an invisible boundary between them. Happiness. Just for Derek to try dancing back. So that made Stiles' happy little bubble burst out fairly quickly once he realized what was going on and all his attempts to talk alone with the other man were somehow sabotaged.
Yes, he tried to be patient and understanding for a while. He even surprised himself that he lasted this long. But even he had his limits and even if he was right about what Derek was doing, it didn't mean that it wasn't hurting him. Both nights he was lying awake for hours on the couch, his tired brain trying to figure out a way to make Derek see that he shouldn't do this. That he should give this a chance. But then again, Stiles' darker thoughts chimed in time after time with their "what ifs".
What if Derek regretted that kiss? What if he only blamed it on nearly losing control? What if Stiles' hopes were too high? What if Derek didn't really want him like Stiles wanted the other man? What if nothing comes out of this just pain and heartache?
What if Stiles has already lost what he's been wanting for such a long time?
These thoughts were driving Stiles mad just as much as Derek's nightmare episodes made him worried sick. He didn't intervene, didn't want to make things worse. Because what if he was making things worse for Derek? That was the last thing he wanted, but because he refused to talk to him about this, Stiles' dark thoughts gained more and more ground, making the middle of his chest throb with pain.
The lack of sleep started to show on his face and in the slump of his shoulders too. He was paler than usual, dark circles under his eyes and he grew more and more quiet and distant too in order to protect himself. Because he knew if confronting Derek isn't going to bring the result he was hoping for, then he needed that protection.
The weekend finally arrived. Stiles already loved Beth, but he was a bit glad that Derek's buffer was gone. He gave the wolf this long to play his tricks and sneak around – as if Stiles didn't notice... But enough was enough. When Derek tried to sneak out with the excuse of 'needing some parts for his car' and completely forgetting that they were supposed to go practice with the guns, Stiles simply walked up to Derek in the hallway, hands in the pockets of his grey hoodie, and looked him in the eye with his sad brown ones.
"You're chickening out..." he said softer than he intended. The blaming undertone was missing, there was only sadness in its place. By then Stiles got to the point when it felt as if his very soul was hurting from the rejection. "Why?"
"It's not chickening out." The defense was immediate because Derek hated being labeled as a coward even when it was clearly true. He was evading the entire issue even when it was only doing them both harm. That much was painfully obvious with how Stiles looked. This was supposed to be his two week vacation, and he looked pale, exhausted, forced to sleep on the couch and having to deal with Derek and his daughter. He reeked of sadness and depression and that was on the Hale. He had done that. "It's better this way."
Derek didn't want to talk about it. It wasn't because he didn't want Stiles, it was because he wanted him too much. Having those kinds of feelings for somebody was dangerous, for both of them – the past has proven that extensively. People around him got hurt, they died. Or they used him just to leave again while those around him got hurt instead.
Paige had died, because he had loved her too much and had wanted her to be with him forever. His entire family got killed because he had fallen for an older woman who had only used him to burn the house down and with that his whole world. Jennifer had killed many people and had injured Stiles' father even, and he had loved her, unwillingly at that. Walter had been perpetually unhappy due to him to where he had felt he needed to ghost Derek to get rid of him. Beth had gone to Hell because of him. Boyd and Erica had died because of him.
Stiles was one of the few friends left, and Derek couldn't be the one to extinguish the light in those whiskey-brown eyes, to take away his smiles and happiness. If he died because of him, he'd never forgive himself so he didn't get to be selfish. He didn't get to be in love. Stiles deserved so much better than him. Crossing his arms as a shield, even though he wasn't feeling cold, he knew Stiles needed more than those few words.
"I don't want to watch your smiles fade, I don't want to smell your sadness when you're around me. I don't want to cause panic attacks, I don't want to make you angry all the time. I don't want to be the one to ruin you and break you. Look at yourself. That's what I do."
"Oh my god..." The words rushed out of Stiles' mouth and he shook his head in frustration. "You're being an idiot, Derek," he huffed, his hands coming out of his hoodie's pockets to run them through his hair with a 'what am I supposed to do with you now?' kind of gesture, making it stand in every possible direction. Then he dropped them down to his sides and he sighed, drinking in the defensive position Derek took up.
Goddammit, he looked hot even like this... Not fair. Stiles will never look anywhere near as hot as Derek in general was. He was too scrawny even with the lean muscles he was packing ever since his training. His upturned nose and bow-shaped lips were too unconventional, his face too soft for the classical male beauty standards. Not that it bothered Stiles. He had accepted himself the way he is after the teenage angst had died out of him.
"Do I really have to spell it out that you are doing this to me with avoiding and not talking to me?" he asked, trying not to rub the middle of his own chest as it was still kinda throbbing with pain from Derek's ‘it's better this way’ bullshit. "I know you are scared of losing the few people who are close to you and care about you. But I'm not going anywhere. I never really was gone. You know that, don't you?" he asked, wandering a few steps closer to him. He hoped Derek knew that Stiles would always drop everything to come and help him.
"The only thing I'm scared of is... never giving us a chance. Because man, there's chemistry... among other things..." he chuckled a bit nervously. Yes, he was nervous because he didn't know how to persuade Derek without going overboard with it. This was too important for that to mess it up with his usual hyperactive behavior.
"You are one of my closest friends. We've been together through so much crazy shit. That and our friendship is a bond that will never break, if you are afraid of that. Because yes, I thought about this too. But how long do you want to deny yourself to be happy with someone who... genuinely and deeply cares for you and your kid? And... news flash, Derek, I'm already ruined and broken too. We both are. That doesn't mean we cannot let this grow between us. Maybe for a change it could heal both of us. Unless you don't want me like that. If I terribly misread something, just tell me that you don't want me while looking into my eyes and I'll back off and pretend nothing had happened..." he said braver than he felt. As he was waiting for Derek's response, his cheeks colored a tiny bit and his heart jumped up into his throat.
What if Derek says no?
The look he got when he was told he was being an idiot was a mix of a kicked puppy and an insulted alpha. Because how was doing the right thing, the safest thing, idiotic? There was a distinct huff but he didn't run off, instead he was willing to listen to the explanation that was no doubt coming.
Honestly, it was expected. Stiles was stubborn and if he had his mind set to something, nothing could persuade him otherwise, not even a growling alpha. The human had very little survival instinct when it came to his own life. Clearly all the detective training hadn't changed that. It was probably what made him good at it in the first place. But what he didn't realize was that scared wasn't even coming close to what Derek was actually feeling. He was terrified. Having so few left, having thrown himself into it again and again to only lose out... It had made him weary and careful. Of course he knew Stiles would come if he had called him, he'd drop everything. It was why he hadn't. He had gotten out, away from Beacon Hills, Derek wouldn't pull him back into that mess.
Tensing slightly as Stiles stepped closer, he attempted to swallow but his mouth felt too dry, his heart was too busy hammering away in there. Or so it felt. And Derek? Derek was a terrible liar, he couldn't look into his eyes and lie like that, even though he should. This was his way out, he could say he had been wrong, nothing was there and it would go back to the way it was. Even if it was a cop out, Stiles would let him and he'd back off, he knew that much. Only, when he tried to say it, it was like his tongue refused to work.
Eyes met, this silent conversation going on before his mouth could say anything. 'I don't like you like that.' That was what he was going to say only what came out was: "You didn't misread it." His eyes widened, because he surprised himself. It was a classic Derek Hale move, to ruin everything eventually. Because that's what was going to happen and there was no way back now. The chemistry was of course unmistakably there, and the fact that Stiles and Beth got along so well, wanted to be with her even, had been a very important thing for him to witness. She was always going to be his number one so if she wasn't accepted, then Derek wasn't accepted.
Reaching out, he ignored the way his hand trembled as he cupped Stiles' cheek, caressing the mole-dotted skin with a warm thumb. "I can't lose you too."
The tension was killing him, but Stiles knew he had to be a little more patient for Derek's answer. He could see how he was struggling with himself as the seconds dragged along. Then once he finally spoke, it felt as if a huge weight was lifted off the younger man's chest. He exhaled long and slow and let Derek touch his face. He too lifted his hands. One went to the back of Derek's to keep it on his face, the other lightly fisting around the shirt by Derek's side. As if he wanted to anchor the werewolf and stop him from running off.
Stiles didn't miss the significance of both sentences. There was that amber flicker in the depth of his irises again as his eyes and expression softened. He wanted to wrap that warmth from Derek's hand all around him to hide in it. For many a wolf – even more an alpha – would be scary. But for Stiles the possibility of not having the affection of this one was the scary.
"You'll never lose me, Derek. One way or another I'll be always with you," he whispered, his own hands slightly trembling too, the grip around the shirt tightening a bit. His mind was starting to finally catch up with the fact that this was a 'yes' from the Hale. It was huge and very important to Stiles. He wanted to... jump up and down and shout on the top of his lungs, but he didn't do any of that.
Instead he cut the remaining distance between them and hugged Derek tight. He couldn't believe it that Derek Hale finally, FINALLY gave in to him. That he was now allowed to do such simple things like hugging him whenever he wanted... He won't get sharp looks anymore to take his hand off him... These were small things, but they also warmed Stiles' wildly beating heart. He's been waiting for this for years.
"We can take it slow... well, if the last few years weren't like a fucking long foreplay..." he snorted more to himself then continued. "We can keep it between just the two of us for now. See how and where it goes." Here he pulled back in the embrace enough to be able to look into Derek's eyes again. "But I need you to be open with me. Talk to me. Please. Don't close me out. I... I want you. ALL of you, hear me?"
The promise of never losing him wasn't a lie, he didn't take it as one. But that didn't mean it wasn't going to end up being one. Things could happen, they could have a falling out, one of them could meet somebody else, they could get injured and die. Loss was part of life and the thought of that happening with Stiles was- It hurt to even think about it. Despite the little soul left, he knew losing Stiles would hurt him beyond what would be okay and that if he was going to allow himself this, this falling in love, there wouldn't be a way back, not anymore. Their friendship was going to change and if they ever should stop being lovers, then the friendship would stop as well. It was a huge risk he was taking.
But why did it feel so right? It wasn't even falling in love anymore, it was falling into place. Having the human plastered against his body, to feel that frantic heart beating against his chest, to feel that palpable relief and giddiness coming off the other. They belonged like this. And he had known that for years. They had known that for years.
Taking it slow was going to be something Derek needed, but it wasn't going to work like that. Their first kiss had proven as much, so he doubted they were capable of it. To try it though, that would be good. He was going to need time to wrap his head around this even though his heart was fully with it. If anything, it was all set on making this unavoidably forever.
"I don't want to keep it between just us." As much as the sneaking around would probably be exciting for a bit, it wasn't going to work. Beth was a werewolf, she was going to pick up on it and Noah? Well, Stiles wasn't the only Stilinski who was too perceptive.
"Thank fuck you said that... Sneaking around for my dad's sake – because I doubt Beth wouldn't pick up on it fast – would've been fun for a while, but I prefer to play with open cards too. He knows I like guys too, but have no idea how he would react to... us..."
"Beth will know. She'll scent me on you and the other way around. Soon our scents will mingle. Werewolves at her age are very instinctual," Derek said.
"I don't know how to be open, I will try but I'm gonna need reminding sometimes. I'm not good at... this. Talking. I want to talk, I never know how to." Stiles was already getting more than most, but the wolf was terrible at communicating, which also complicated any relationships he had. But if he wanted to not break Stiles more than he claimed he already was, he was going to have to try. His arms went around Stiles fully now, pressing his nose in his neck to openly smell him, enjoying the scent of home the boy had on him.
"As for the talking... Well, I talk enough for both of us and can guess a lot of things you don't say out verbally, but yeah, we'll have to work on that a bit," Stiles chuckled and ran a hand through Derek’s hair by his nape as he let the wolf inhale him. "I don't mind, though. As long as you are willing to try..." he smiled softly as he closed his eyes.
That feeling of 'this is so right' was back again. The last time Stiles felt it was two days ago in the kitchen when they were kissing like their lives depended on it. It was even stronger now, just like that strange pull by his belly. It was like the puzzle pieces falling into place. They falling into place. Stiles shivered pleasantly and smiled to himself from the way Derek scented him.
Secretly he always liked it when wolves did that. He found it fascinating and could only imagine how complex that process really was to be able to read people and situations from using only their noses. How they could tell if someone was happy or sad or whatever... Well, now Derek probably smelled just happiness on him – and whatever else that he seemed to like. Stiles was observant so he'd picked up on the fact years ago that Derek seemed to like his scent. Which was pleasing in a weird way.
"I wanted you since you were seventeen. I never knew you felt the same way. You were too young for me, you were better off without me to explore school and college life," Derek admitted.
Stiles’ mouth formed a small surprised "oh," finally realizing just how long Derek's been harboring feelings for him. "That's flattering, but I'm not too young for you anymore... And... I wanted you since I was seventeen and thank fuck school and college years are over, so..." he chuckled again and shrugged a shoulder. "There's nothing that can stop me from doing this..."And with that, Stiles leaned in to press his lips against Derek's so they could finally share their first chaste/sensual kiss.
During that kiss he was absently stroking the back of Derek's neck, and also enjoyed running his fingertips through the soft dark-brown hair. "We'll see, I guess. How and when do you want to tell my dad?" he asked, a little bit still in disbelief that they were really talking about announcing to his dad that they were now... together. Wow! So yeah, it seemed Stiles was going to need some time to get used to this change in their relationship too...
As for the sheriff, Derek actually had a feeling that Noah wasn't going to be surprised, he knew his son. If the crush for him was as deep as the one there had been for Lydia, which hadn't been subtle at all, then yeah, this wasn't going to be news. Especially now. Stiles was giving heart eyes and blushes and giggles. Derek looked at him with fond exasperation because even if they had wanted to keep this under wraps for a while, it wouldn't have worked. "I don't think we'll have to tell him, Stiles. You're you."
It wasn't an insult, especially not now. The Hale disliked fake people, too smooth people, the ones capable of lying. He felt most comfortable with those who hid nothing. Probably because he himself was closed off and Stiles was the complete opposite of him.
Leaning into the touches, like a cat would at being petted because he liked his hair being played with, Derek hummed softly. Yes, Stiles talked enough for the both of them and he was more into using his facial expressions and his body language to communicate. There were only a few whom he could have a conversation with where they talked and he used visceral ways of giving answers. One was Peter, the other one was currently in his arms, the younger man having an uncanny understanding of all things Derek Hale. And he needed that, he needed somebody willing to let him be himself because he was never going to be much of a talker vocally but that didn't mean he wasn't saying anything.
Hands had moved to his cheeks, raking through the crass stubble hairs as he rambled on. Yeah, he wasn't a child anymore and they would have had less age difference between them if Derek hadn't aged in Hell. Still, he wouldn't age so they'd be of the same age soon enough. Derek had been nineteen at the time they met but he had lied about his age, making himself older. Being werewolf made that easier since age was way more fluent for them. He was going to be able to revert some of the age showing on his face once he was restored to full health.
Derek wanted to say something back, though he didn't get the chance to. Lips found his own, but they didn't have anything like the desperate hunger the first kiss had. It was slow, languid, full of tasting and promises and warmth? It was like feeling electricity shooting through him. It was unlike anything he felt before. It had to be the magic Stiles was dabbling with reacting to the werewolf. Whatever it was, it felt good. And the fact he felt something like that when it wasn't because he was in pain made him want to smile.
"Truth be told, I find it sexy that our scents will mingle..." Stiles grinned in-between their soft, exploring kisses then he chuckled low too. "True, I'm me and BH has a sharp Sheriff. But what if we stopped talking about my dad now? One cock-blocking because of him was enough, don't you think? We should rather decide if you really need those parts for your car… Or if you want to go shooting instead... oooor get more of this?" Stiles wiggled his brows a few times and kissed Derek again, this time deeper, pushing his tongue past the surprisingly soft lips, coaxing the other tongue to join in.
The longer he was kissing Derek, the more that warm energy in him and between them was growing, making the detective flushed and warm all over. After a while he could feel that it was partly the awakening magic in him reacting, not just that strange connection which Stiles could nearly see tighten between them.
It was so mind-blowing and exciting for him that he could finally kiss Derek like this! And that – for now – the alpha let him lead. He didn't expect that. But he knew they would have to talk about many, many things if they wanted to give this a real try. And Stiles knew that he was all in. For Derek it was worth it...
With a chuckle, Derek easily agreed that yes, he could stop talking about the sheriff so Stiles wouldn't feel so awkward because it wasn't working as much as a cock-block for Derek. Unless of course he'd come home again because he didn't want the man to find his son locking lips with a werewolf. Because that was happening right now, the kiss was deepened, and he didn't get the chance to answer the questions as the other decided for them that he wanted more of this.
They were still standing in the hallway, clutching at one another, not a chance of moving anytime soon as Stiles took charge of the kiss. His tongue was bold in its exploration, coaxing a reaction out of the older man, pleased he was allowed to lead. And that amused Derek because he wasn't a typical alpha male and Stiles had no idea. So yes, he let him take charge of their kiss because he so didn't care about that – they were kissing and that was all that mattered. He got to taste all of Stiles, have the warmth melt against their bodies while their tongues caressed and danced together, their lips hungrily nibbled on. Honestly, he was okay with doing this the rest of the afternoon but not in a hallway.
Pulling away, to be able to swallow some saliva and battle the dry mouth, there was an easy shrug. "I don't need parts for the car. I was going to drive around for a while." So that plan was out, he was glad he didn't need to hide out in the Camaro the entire day. "And as much as I want to keep kissing you, it's probably smart to get out of the house." Because they had the place to themselves and it would be tempting to make use of it. Even a man like Derek had moments of little control, especially around Stiles now that it was allowed to act on certain... urges.
Stiles quickly had to realize that he loved all the different type of kisses they shared. That mind-blowing passionate one from two days ago, this deeper kind and also the playful and nibbling ones. It didn't matter which they did as long as they were kissing. It was new, yes, but already a kind of drug Stiles knew he was going to get totally hooked on... And man, he wanted to stay in the house... Alone with Derek. It was very tempting and made his blood rush, not even attempting to hide from his eyes what he was thinking as he drummed one hand's fingertips against Derek's shirt on his chest.
"Hmmm... That would be the wise choice, yes. If we want to go slow-ish..." he said, consciously not using 'slow'. "But it's... hard... to be wise right now, don't you think?" he asked, grinning on his pun. Because yes, he was more than half-hard by the time they paused in their kissing. "But... we could go shoot some cans then make out some more on the backseat afterwards... How does that sound?" he purred smugly from his brilliant plan, fingers drawing small spirals on said chest just to mess Derek up a bit more. Now that he knew he had such a power over him, he was going to use it as much as he dared...
Besides, it was something he had always fantasized about as a teen... Making out in that hot car with this even hotter man. For a while he blamed his teenage hormones for that, but then Stiles knew it was more than that, even then.
Obviously, Stiles was going to make it hard to go slow-ish, but he didn't realize it didn't need to be worked for. Only smelling his arousal was already enough for Derek to get in a similar state and he had no doubt that making out in the backseat of his car was going to be more than that if he didn't stop it. The whole problem was, he didn't want to stop it. The idea of the Camaro ending up smelling like the human was too tempting to pass up on.
"I'm glad you don't want it to be your jeep. Bleeding out on it was already a discomfort, let alone making out in it." And it would be cramped. Not that his car was spacious, but it at least had leather seats which were made for easier cleaning because he had bothered to have them treated with a special coating. Something needed when a werewolf like him was the owner, because too often it would involve blood.
For a moment Derek missed the other Camaro, the one he had stolen in South America and had imported. The ex had crashed it and sold the parts at his insistence. Derek hadn't had the time to look for another one. Which he should, because the Toyota was gone and the Camaro wasn't exactly a family car. Grabbing at the human's wrist to still his tempting caresses, he shook his head, amused. "Go grab your supplies, you've made your point." Though the kisses had made the points for him and not the talking.
"You're the best!" Stiles beamed up at the slightly taller man... his... boyfriend? lover? both?... and quickly pecked Derek's stubbly face, trying not to think about how exciting the roughness of it would feel on certain parts of his very... stirring body. Freeing his wrist from the light grip, he forced himself to take a few steps back, victory clear in his amber eyes and a huge grin plastered over his face. He paused for a moment, drinking in the sight of the other man. He found him gorgeous, even if he wasn't back to his former glory just yet because of the time spent in Hell. But Stiles swore to himself that he would find a way to help on that too. Oh, and Derek was especially gorgeous with his slightly swollen and moist lips after their kissing. Not to mention the look he gave him.
"Ooookay, I'm going. I really am going..." Stiles mumbled to himself and took a deep breath which rushed out of him with a sigh. After that, he did finally turn around to go down into the basement where his dad kept his private guns and shotguns locked up securely. The Argents weren't the only weapon enthusiasts in town and back in the day, he had noticed how his dad's collection seemed to have grown a bit once he had learned about the creatures roaming on the streets of Beacon Hills. Stiles also remembered how once he had a heart-to-heart talk with his dad about his future and what kind of job he wanted to do. Noah took him out to the woods and started teaching him how to handle a gun. To be able to protect himself better, because Stiles made it very clear that he wasn't going to stop running with the wolves... his pack. And of course, the human criminals he was going to chase in the force wouldn't get intimidated by just a baseball bat and his big mouth. Honestly, the latter would probably only cause more problems...
Walking down the steps, he got the key to the gun cabinet and put a bag on a nearby table. He didn't know if Derek would follow him or not, but he made sure to pack a variety of guns and both blanks and real bullets. In a separate cabinet there were special bullets locked up too to fight all kinds of creatures. Stiles had a contact who could get them such stuff and he also suspected that Chris Argent might have supplied his dad too.
Before packing in the guns and a shotgun too, he checked them with the confidence and sure hand of a professionally trained person. He also allowed his mind to wander a bit, trying to guess which type of firearm would fit Derek. Because everyone had a type which they felt the most comfortable and confident with.
Meanwhile Derek had decided that it was safer if he stayed upstairs and he let his mind wander while waiting. Stiles' excitement was contagious, it made him feel energetic and smile, slightly, while the human was staring at him like he was artwork he was attempting to interpret. It was something he did, the staring, though in the past it had been done when he had thought the wolf hadn't been looking. Derek had known though, subtlety was lost on Stiles, that burning gaze directed at him had been hard to miss, easier to ignore. It was probably why the other was so good at reading him though, even now, after all those hours of studying every little thing he had done. But now? Now that burning look had taken on a more needy quality, and there was distinct awe which made Derek shuffle a bit, a flush coloring the tip of his ears. It was a silent praise so he took it as such, glad when the younger man finally realized he was staring and ran off.
There were a lot of sounds coming from the basement, the rough slide of metal, the clinking of bullets, a bag being unzipped. Meanwhile Derek checked to make sure he had his wallet and phone on him because he was planning on buying them food. At some point. Besides his jacket and keys, he didn't need anything else so instead he busied himself by clearing away the mugs of coffee and putting toys of Beth away. It's why she had a toy chest, so Noah's living room didn't need to turn into her own personal playground all the time. The weekends were normally quiet, he'd spend some time with Lydia and Beth though never wanted to take away from bonding time. So he was alone the three days, usually. It might involve trips to San Francisco in the very near future, depending on Stiles' schedule.
He found himself lingering, listening to Stiles rummaging about, nerves making his stomach flutter. Saying yes instead of no, it hadn't been in the plan, so it should have felt off, wrong. Instead it felt like he had made the one decision in his life (besides having Beth) that felt good. It was so easy to imagine a life for them, they had been sharing life for years and the break hadn't diminished that at all. Maybe that's why he was so nervous in the first place, because it felt so right. That shouldn't be happening, karma usually would manage to fuck that up.
Checking the phone for messages, even though he knew Lydia would call him and not text if there was something wrong, he paced a few steps before he stopped and laughed at himself. He was behaving like a smitten teen waiting for his prom date to appear and he’d never even been to prom!
It took only like five minutes for Stiles to pack everything together and lock the cabinet. He was staring at the guns in the bag, slightly trembling hand lingering over the zipper. Derek was waiting for him upstairs, he reminded himself. But he needed a moment to let everything that just happened fully sink in. The man he's been pining for… for god knows how many years – it felt more like an eternity by then – finally said yes, although Stiles had the suspicion that it wasn't what he was originally planning to do. But he said it anyway. Derek... wanted him back. He's been wanting him since Stiles was seventeen... Holy-moly... That was something he had to wrap his mind around, because it was overwriting every memory he had of the two of them. His mind was searching for clues, hints, anything that would've made him realize. But then again... deep down... he probably always knew just didn't dare to believe it.
Now he dared. What better confirmation than saying yes and kissing him back? Even that memory made his heart beat like crazy so he had to take a few deep calming breaths. They were going to handle guns. He had to pay more attention and bring his professional side forth. In a minute. For a few sweet moments he let that happy feeling linger, warming his insides all over. Derek Hale, the alpha, chose him. The skinny, defenseless human. Okay, he wasn't that skinny or defenseless anymore, but still... Although Stiles knew that it was much more than that. They definitely always had a connection – now even more so. He could feel it. A kind of bond or something. He was curious if Derek felt it too yet. Maybe with time Stiles will ask him about it. For now he was just glad that they finally got this far. It was a very important step for both of them.
And it opened up endless possibilities for the future. Stiles could feel his future rapidly shifting, rearranging itself around Derek and Beth on its own, making his head a bit dizzy with all the plans and pictures. He needed another deep breath and long exhale to slow it down and to be able to focus only on the next step.
Step by step, he reminded himself then finally zipped up the bag. They will have time to talk. Now they had a task to do. Nodding to himself, the detective grabbed the bag and walked upstairs. His stance has changed a bit. He walked straighter and more confident as if he could feel the responsibility carrying the guns and teaching Derek meant. His expression was more serious too, but he couldn't stop a soft smile when he saw that Derek hadn't run away from him just yet.
"Let's get this party started, shall we?" he winked at him then passed Derek to head towards the trunk of the Camaro.
'What took you so long?' was right at the tip of Derek’s tongue when Stiles finally made his way upstairs, but he swallowed it in time when he glanced at the clock and saw it had only been ten minutes. It had felt like thirty, at least. The bag smelled like gun oil and powder, a too familiar scent and he knew it was going to be a scent he was going to associate with Stiles from now on. He was a detective, he carried a gun of his own, like his father. The gun was going to be used sometimes, especially at target practice and hopefully not too often at work.
Derek had no idea what it was like to be a detective in a city like San Francisco, but it was probably just as dangerous as Stiles' youth had been in Beacon Hills. Admittedly, it had calmed down a little. Scott was in LA most of the time, there was no actual pack besides Derek's attempt at making one so it didn't draw people here to fight the McCall pack. It had been years since the last 'monster' showing his/her face. Or so Deaton and Noah had said.
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