Chapter 7
2020.10.25. 20:58
Chapter 7
In the end they found themselves a bottle of whiskey from the nice kind and a bowl in the kitchen to put the chips in it. Stiles poured them the drinks in cups and feeling more confident and relaxed, led Derek to one of the couches in the living room when he spotted enough free space for both of them. It was a tight fit and his whole left side was quickly getting warmer from being pressed from shoulder to knee against Derek's. While his body was hungrily absorbing that nice warmth, Stiles handed the bowl of chips over and raised his plastic cup.
"Here's to getting warmer!" he chuckled then took a few careful sips, making some funny flinches as the drink burned its way down his throat but nearly immediately started warming up his belly. "Uh, much better," he grunted more to himself then took some chips and stuffed his mouth with it, chewing fast. "You know... this party doesn't suck so far. I'm glad Danny invited us," he said while watching Scott circling Allison who was talking to Lydia not far. Stiles' eyes met Scott's for a second and the sitting teen nodded to greet him then gave him a thumbs up as encouragement. He was totally rooting for Scott mustering up the courage to ask Allison for a dance or just finally say something to her. His best friend has been mooning over the pretty girl for the last couple of months.
Derek's attention has shifted to where Stiles was looking, spotting Scott circling the Argent girl. Hunters. Dangerous but not to a human like Scott. The girl wasn't even actively hunting yet. If anything, she didn't seem like she knew about werewolves. She avoided him, and he avoided her, which worked out great for both of them even though the school wasn't that big and they had some mutual acquaintances. Because Martin and Whittemore were sooo not his friends, they just hung out in the same circles, that's all. Scott was having a big puppy grin, completely into the girl who didn't even seem to realize it. It made Derek snort as Scott was inching closer and closer.
Stiles suddenly blinked and looked back at Derek, feeling his always intense gaze on him. "Derek... there's something I've been meaning to ask during the week but I always chickened out because... well, I'm me..." he gave a long pause. "Don't get mad or anything, I just... This..." here he motioned between the two of them with a few chips between his fingers, a couple of small pieces falling onto their jeans-clad legs. "... isn't just some stupid bet between you and your friends, like in those lame yet at the same time strangely entertaining teen movies, right? Which would end with me and Scott being made fun of?" he lightly frowned, the anxiety and fear real in his eyes. He really hoped he wasn't messing things up if it wasn't the case, but he also had to know, had to see the truth in Derek's eyes no matter what his answer was going to be. Because until now he was pretty sure the other boy never lied to him. And this was kinda important for Stiles to know before he let himself open up more – or the alcohol did that to him more. Whoa, this whiskey was strong if it already gave him this much courage!
Blinking at the sudden attention thrown his way from Stilinski, Derek realized he had been watching Stiles more than the rest of the party. The ramble made him confused. Was that what Stiles really thought? That this was some kind of a game or another mean way to bully him? Just how much has he been bullied to have that kind of thoughts about others? For the first time, Derek realized that his popularity had given him immunity to things he didn't even know were going on. A rose-colored glasses in a way. It hadn't even occurred to him once that this was something others would do, it had seemed to be just a stupid movies thing.
The thought of others hurting Stiles, daring to harm him with actions like those…The acid scent of anxiety was coming off of the teen in waves, as if Stiles was preparing himself for the hurt already. His hand closed into a fist, smashing the chips there into tiny crumbs.
"Anybody who tries to hurt you like that will get a fist. In the face." It came out like an angry snarl, his control gone for a moment and he had to breathe a few times, letting the chips fall to the ground as he unclenched his hand.
"Why did you come if you thought this was me making fun of you? Which I'm not, by the way. I'm not spending time with you because of some bet or to get you hurt. I didn't even know that was a thing that happens."
For a few moments Stiles tensed up even more seeing Derek's sudden anger. He'd never seen him like this before, so he didn't know what to expect. His heart was kinda bleeding a bit for the poor murdered chips. Then he dared to breathe again and fidgeted a bit.
"Oh... it happens in real life too," he said only that. It was clear that in some ways Derek was so naive to the world because of who he was and how he seemed to only mind his own business. And until recently people like Stiles or Scott weren't his business.
"I came because... I... I really hoped that this between us was real, not a lie," he confessed as close to the truth as he dared. After all, he couldn't just blurt out to Derek so soon that he liked him. For nearly a year! That'd be maybe creepy. Like he was a stalker or something. Plus there was that unanswered question if Derek played on this team at all. Because yeah, his gestures could be considered flirting and Stiles knew Derek had no problems with whatever sexual orientations (like he was good friends with Danny, for example). But yeah, no definite answer to the liking boys thing yet and there wasn't enough alcohol in Stiles yet to dare to ask something like that!
But right now... right now he was just searching the other boy's face and look for a while and when he seemed to find what he was looking for, his muscles relaxed and his anxiety faded a bit. Derek was telling the truth. As far as he could tell.
"I can see that you're telling the truth, which is a relief. Because I very much liked the last week with our chats and weird lunch breaks at school. Okay, it was mostly weird for me and those who have no idea why suddenly the two geek sits with the popular kids," he chuckled a bit nervously, trying to joke a bit. It was like a compulsive thing for him. "What I'm trying to say is that... I'm relieved. I like being friends with you, Derek Hale," he managed a smile at the end.
This between us. It sounded promising but it wasn't exactly naming what this between them actually was. Did Stiles meant it about them being friends or did he use it to describe it because he was unsure if he should say it differently? Derek thought he had been pretty clear when he hadn't corrected Danny on the boyfriend thing and had said that this today was a date. He had shared his food at lunch with Stiles all the time, picking up extras so he could feed the other boy which Stiles always accepted without even a pause this past week.
"I like being friends with you too, Stilinski. I wouldn't be sitting with you at lunch or talking to you on Messenger if I didn't. I don't do what others want me to do." Derek realized it sounded a little weird considering he definitely listened to his family but not in the way of with whom to be friends with. He was stubborn like that, didn't want anybody to tell him with whom to spend his time with. "And I'm serious, the bullying is over. I won't let it happen again."
Kind of hard to stop something he didn't know was going on, but he was going to have to keep a closer eye on the other boy, that was clear. Drinking from the whiskey, or more like downing the entirety of the cup, Derek wished it would work on him so he could have that giddy smile that was starting to appear on Stiles' face, his eyes taking on a certain kind of warmth, betraying the beginning of intoxication. Since his handful of chips got ruined, he took another one to stuff his face with. He was like a hamster whenever he was anxious. It was a good way to keep the mind occupied.
There was a warmth spreading in Stiles' chest which had nothing to do with the alcohol. It was all about Derek's words. They definitely moved him. Besides Scott Stiles didn't really have friends. Sure, there were some people at school with whom he was on good terms, but they weren't friends. So he was happy that Derek had showed interest in becoming one to him, even if at first it kinda freaked him out and had his doubts about it. But Derek was cool and more than that to Stiles.
"Thank you. Your friendship means a lot to me." His protection too, although Stiles didn't really believe that Derek was going to be able to make the bullying stop. He might be a popular kid, but assholes gonna be assholes, right? Not even being the Sheriff's son had managed to stop them in the past. Maybe it made things worse too. "And I can protect myself if I have to. I don't like to be the damsel in distress," Stiles scoffed, finding Derek kinda adorable with the stress eating. Because he had observed that about the Hale, yes.
To try to further ease the tension, he briefly placed his free hand on the Hale's knee and exchanged a grateful (and maybe a bit dreamy) look with him. Just to be interrupted by Scott. Oh god, Scott! A best friend with the worst timing.
"Hey, hi!" he greeted both of them then turned to Stiles with an urgent look. "Can I talk to you for a sec?" he asked Stiles.
"Sure, dude," Stiles frowned questioningly and glimpsed at Derek. "Sorry. I'll be back," he said and stood up, letting Scott drag him along towards the door that led to the garden.
"I need your help, man!" Scott kinda whined the second they were outside and he swirled around, grabbing Stiles' upper-arms. A man of desperation, the mole-dotted teen thought.
"What's up?"
"It's Allison..."
"Of course it is..." Stiles rolled his eyes with a fond smile. As if this was news to him, tsk...
"How do I talk to her? She's so out of my league and usually around others..." Scott ignored his remark.
"Of course she is. It's a party, duh."
"You know what I mean, Stiles..." This time it was Scott's turn to roll his eyes at his friend.
"I do. Listen, Scotty... Instead of coming up with an elaborate, over-complicated and unnecessary plan, how about you just go up to her and ask if she wants a drink or a dance. Oh and introduce yourself first. First good impression and all that, ya know."
"Oh... okay. You're probably right. I've been freaking myself out over this all day..." Scott scratched his forehead.
"I saw some of it, yes. Just... chill out a bit. Break the ice with a 'hello' or something and for god's sake... put those brown puppy eyes to work! You have a natural talent coming off as cute and warm dude with that weapon. It's good not just for getting out of trouble but to get INTO some of it too, if you know what I mean..." Stiles wiggled his brows.
It took a moment or two for Scott to get it, but Stiles wasn't surprised that the light was switched on like this. Ever since they were kids, Stiles was the quicker boy in understanding and connecting things together. No wonder with his restless and all over the place brain, but he never held it against Scott that he was somewhat slower. Stiles knew that it probably was not easy to be friends with someone like him and he appreciated Scott very much. And if he needed a wingman tonight to make first contact with the girl he liked, Stiles wasn't going to say no to helping him.
But thankfully it seemed, this time Stiles didn't need more than just advice and a bit of a pep talk. Scott wanted to do this alone - as he should. Good boy. So Stiles smirked at him and patted his shoulder. "You're ready."
"Yes, think so. Thanks, dude!" Scott hugged him briefly. "And I'll catch up with you about Derek tomorrow, okay?"
"Okay. Now shoo! Don't wait until someone else gets to her!" Stiles nudged Scott towards the door and his friend went with a silly grin before concentration replaced it.
Stiles smiled and shook his head. He even crossed his fingers for his friend. He was a good kid with a big heart and would really deserve some success on the girls front. Scott's words though put Derek back into his mind and he too headed back inside to look for his... 'date'.
***
Things were starting to get good, Stiles had finally dared to put a hand on his knee, leaving this warm tingling touch when Scott had to interrupt and the two left for what was no doubt Allison talk while Derek groaned, leaning back on the couch. They had finally gotten somewhere! He sighed, putting the plastic cup on the ground while focusing on the chips to eat, sometimes throwing a greeting when he got one.
"Can we talk, like in private?" Derek looked up at the question, meeting Paige's dark eyes. Glancing back to where Stiles had disappeared to and not seeing him yet, he focused back at her. It couldn't hurt, it wasn't like there was much to talk about at a party. So he nodded and followed her upstairs since the bedrooms were the only places they could talk in private – if they weren't all occupied. He closed the door behind him, looking at the pretty girl with arched eyebrows.
"What's up?"
"I found something when I was cleaning out my closet and I figured you wanted it back. I didn't want to give it out there, they'd talk," Paige grinned and reached into the pocket of her pants to retrieve a folded napkin.
Derek knew what was in there. It had been a weird gift, it was one of his claws, one he had lost in a stupid accident and his mom had made him wear on him as a reminder of the danger he had been. A good luck charm of the sort. He had given it to her after the werewolf talk, because he had to have that talk when he had shifted once things had gotten a little too heated between them. His mom had wanted to take her memory of that talk, but Derek had asked her not to, he trusted Paige. And she had kind of known he wasn't like other boys and kept his secret safe.
"Thanks, I forgot."
"It's dangerous for me to have. Besides, you can use some extra luck, right?"
"Yeah... So you've seen me stumbling my way around him, huh?" Derek rubbed his nape in embarrassment after he put away the napkin.
"It’s not like you, Hale. You go for what you like. So go and get him."
***
Meanwhile downstairs Jackson spotted Stiles looking around with a frown, and downed his beer. A grin played on his face. "Looking for Derek? He's upstairs with Paige, if you know what I mean," he leaned in and winked. "I don't know why she wants to get back with Loner Hale but whatever, her loss."
Stiles looked at Jackson baffled for a second when he couldn't find Derek downstairs and Whittemore leaned in. First he didn't know why the guy would want to say a word to him, because aside from some glares, snark and degrading comments, he usually just ignored Stiles as if he didn't even exist. But once he comprehended the words, there was a cold sinking feeling in Stiles' stomach and despite his best efforts to hide his emotions, he wasn't sure he managed to fully do so.
It hurt bad. Like the world was starting to crack around him before it'd fall apart. Which was stupid. He was stupid. So, so very stupid...
"Oh... I see. Yeah. Whatever," he nodded and felt his vision blurring at the edges as it began narrowing down. He had to get out of there because suddenly he couldn't breathe.
So Stiles headed to the couch to snatch up his backpack then towards the front door to get some fresh air but instead of stopping outside, he kept going, his red plastic cup still in hand as he walked down the street, not really seeing where he was going.
He only stopped when a car passed him and the headlights blinded him for a moment. Realizing he still had the cup, he quickly drank the rest of the whiskey, grimacing and hoping that it'd warm the coldness in his stomach, and threw the cup out in a nearby trash bin. Then he took out his phone and texted Scott that he had too much to drink and headed home on foot to walk it off.
For a second his finger hovered over the chat icon he had with Derek, wanting to write him the same, but he didn't want to... disturb him when he was... with Paige.
Putting his phone away, he let the anger rise in him and he started walking again. How could he be so stupid?? He should've seen this coming. Because yeah, it looked like they were going somewhere with Derek tonight. Maybe towards something more than just friends, but Stiles had to read the signs wrong or Derek had to change his mind because now he was with Paige. Maybe he got tired of waiting on Stiles? Or he always wanted to get back together with his first love (after all it was the girl who broke it off) and now that the opportunity had presented itself, he used it? Stiles couldn't blame him. Paige was a beautiful and awesome and talented girl with more friends, or at least that's what he'd heard about her. He couldn't blame Derek for choosing her instead of him. He wouldn't choose himself either. He wasn't really a catch with all the social awkwardness, low self-esteem, ADHD, panic attacks and usually all over the place loud personality, plus yeah, he was a guy and he was still not sure without a doubt if Derek liked guys too...
The next time Stiles looked up, he was close to the playground near the Stilinski house. But he wasn't ready to get home just yet. Not in this state because if his dad was still up (it was just around midnight), he'd ask about the party and would immediately be able to tell that something was wrong with his son. As Sheriff he had some good observation skills too – which obviously ran in the family.
So Stiles ended up sitting into one of the empty swings, dropping his backpack down on the ground, and sighed bitterly, letting himself feel sorry for himself for another crushed dream, for another 'being left behind' experience. Life was cruel and painful for sure... So he just sat there, lightly moving himself with his feet which were touching the ground, and let his hopes crash down hard. It felt like a cold shower as pain twisted his heart and insides. Yay for opening up to new people, right? The anger was gone and was replaced by sadness and silent tears for losing what he never had in the first place.
Why did he think that for once he could be happy? To for once have whom he really wanted?
Stupid, stupid Stiles...
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