Not sure for how long I dozed off on my couch when the phone jerks me off my unconsciousness – back to reality! 9.30 pm already?! Hum, I’m pretending not to be available. The mailbox is off. Five minutes later I give in and pick up. Dig it! It’s my boss.
„I missed you at your desk, Siv! Where the heck did you drown after the Hyatt?! Not acceptable! At least check out next time!“ He sounds more like there would be no ‚next’ anyway. Shit!
„I thought you’d know and plotted it! Don’t you tick me off now!“
„Plotted? What are you talking about? By the way, where are the dictaphone and flash cards?“
Odd – is he pretending to be innocent? Not my boss, hey!
„Ah, and I gave Mr. Kessler your Business Card. He needed you for something, dunno. Looks you behaved this time – he was way delighted.“
Oh my god! That’s not true!
„Mal, be straight with me. You don’t have your sticky fingers in it? There was no interview – not in the usual sense.“
„Ah, well – you’d know what you’re doing there. I have some urgent appointments to handle now. I see you tomorrow, Siv – AT your desk HERE! Nite nite!“
Kessler’s got my number – who else? No doubt about it! I don’t believe it! And like an evil validation the phone buzzes again. When I answer the call there’s silence at the other end for a little moment.
„Everything OK with you?“ Dave’s velvety baritone voice. Are you joking?!
„What do you think? Splendid – couldn’t be any better for ages!“ Furiously I drop the mobile back into the base. Just a moment later the door bell rings. What the...?!
I make my way to the front door and glance through the spyhole. David!
„I know, you’re in there. Come on, open the door.“
In your dreams, diva! I switch off the hallway lights intentionally and slip back into my living room. Half an hour passes by. Dave tried the bell for two times. Silence since then. Can’t help it – must check the door. Nothing. I open it. Dave’s sitting on the top step smoking.
„You knew it?“
He nods. „Sooner or later you would come to check if I was definitely gone.“
How could he penetrate my mind every time so easily?! I’m somewhat scared now.
„May I get inside now? This staircase isn’t really the Park-Hyatt and boring anyway!“
I silently make way for him and he enters the living room letting himself sink onto my cosy couch.
„Fancy a drink?“ „I’d love to, but nothing alcoholic, please.“
Do you want to tease me again, Mr. Gahan?!
„Geeez, do you really think I would forget THAT?“
As we finally sit there sipping grape juice mixed with sparkling mineral it’s me breaking the silence again.
„Well, at least you are really adamant.“
Delicate smile on his face now. „One of my better qualities.“
What the heck is going on here?! I usually have a quick tongue but now I feel kinda stuck!
A few moments pass in silence. Eventually Dave takes my right hand and places it in his crotch. I’m thunderstruck and try to slip off his grip.
„What are you afraid of? You can’t tell me that you don’t want it as well. I can feel it. Your body tells me all I need to know.“
I jump onto my feet.
„Should have known! Why do you males always think there’s no bigger pleasure for us females to pamper your dicks?!“
„YOU MALES?! Hey, I’m David – not just THOSE MEN!“ He’s darting malignant glances at me. I have to be careful! Didn’t he mention bitching excited him?
„Ah, dammit! My head is reeling, Dave!“
Next my leg has furious contact with one of those of the coffee table. And now some tears try to make their way – thank you very much! My resistance is futile – energy level down to zero. I dash to the bathroom suddenly feeling very sick. Praying over the porcelain throne David enters the room. He fetches a small towel and wets it at the bassin. Then he gently cleans my lips and chin, a concerned and unhappy expression on his face.
„Do you really find me that sickening?“
Oh boy, Dave! If you would know...! My tears keep rolling. I shake my head. The taste in my mouth is not very nice. Must be written in my features again because he starts rummaging in his pockets and hands me over some chewing gum.
„Tell me.“ He’s going down to his haunches next to me on the floor. Instead of talking I pull my shirt up. David keeps staring at those scars on my tummy.
„God!“
„The fucko I have to thank these for also thought he had to proove how much he cared for me.“
I’m puzzled seeing his eyes watering and a tear glistening down his cheek.
Tentatively he moves his left hand. I see his craving eyes, nod slightly and then feel his slender long fingers very tenderly following the traces on my skin. And before I can spend another thought his velvety lips wander over them, leaving silky kisses. I can’t resist letting my hands run gently through his hair.
„He was sloshed once again and thought to leave an impression of his deep love to me with a damaged whiskey jar – just because I didn’t let him shag me in that state. He was so madly in love with me that he’d nearly beaten me dead.“ I have to swallow. „And I always thought that this would never happen to ME! I never would let somebody battering me like that! Being sober he was the cosiest and nicest cuddly bear you could think of. After every going berserk he melted in dispair, apologies and promises.“
Dave leans back against the cold tiles. He’s extremely pale now.
„Do you get it now? I don’t have a clue what intrigues you concerning me – but I have no energy left to drag you out of any kind of shite. Hell, you’re married, have a family, success, money, what else do I know! I’m the last one suitable for a spontaneous fuck!“
My anger returns just in time. Fine! Helps me to get out of this weak position I manoeuverd myself into. So I get up.
„No, please! Don’t slam that door again!“ David keeps my hands firmly in his and gets up himself.
„Please leave now, Dave. I can’t stand it any longer!“
He gently sweeps a teardrop from the corner of my mouth. Wow – I could drown in those eyes!
„I won’t leave you here alone like THIS! And do you really think I have that little self-restraint that I would take advantage of you? Hey, I’m no asshole!“
We get out off the bathroom. I open the door to my bedroom.
„I simply can’t do this! You can’t stay with me. Yet I wish it would be different!“
„Then let me wait till you fell asleep, please. I will go, I promise.“
I’m sinking onto my King Size bed. „Would you mind to turn around, please?“
I slip out off my shirt and jeans and into my Sleepshirt. When he looks back at me I’m already cuddled into my sheets. He takes off his jacket and boots and lays down next to me. His right arm closes around me like a shield – well, that’s how it feels in this moment. Odd – me and my changing perception!
„I wish I could take away the pain...you have nothing to fear!“ He whispers it into my ear and I’m sure he really means it. His forehead closes the gap between us resting against mine now.
„Shut your eyes, baby – everything will turn out fine!“
He starts humming, caressing my hair. It’s a childrens lullaby. Does he sing it for Stella as well every night? Dunno, but I trust him and start to relax in his embrace. His voice starts trailing off, muted, softer...and I sink into Morpheus’ arms.