18 - If You Dare - Part 3
2020.10.04. 17:17
18: If You Dare – Part 3
Blinking a few times, Derek woke up to feeling like he had been run over, twice. And then backed into a couple of times. Groggily attempting to stir, he had no idea where he even was, it smelled different, it wasn't the loft. It smelled like Sitles but also Argent and Melissa so there was a lot of confusion at the moment. Three heartbeats in the house, two what he assumed were downstairs, one right next to him and that got his attention. He dared to peek sideways, right into wide whiskey-brown eyes.
Stiles. That was good. That was normal. Stretching, he tested limbs. All was working but it felt like he had been asleep for like a week, deeply asleep so maybe healing sleep? That made him blink some more, discovering an IV pole next to the bed, plastic tubing going from it to him, needle in his hand with saline and there was something in his neck too. Touching it, he discovered another needle, sort of, it felt different and was stuck deeper inside.
"Wh...." His mouth was dry and he cleared his throat. "What happened?" There were some disjointed memories, not even sure if that had been dreams or memories although as he asked what happened, more was coming back. Stupidly he quickly checked under the sheets, at his stomach where he thought a sword had been? But he didn't know why he thought that. He could put a few things together. The saline drip was something he had gotten when he had lost a lot of blood and his body felt like it had died, again. The sword had been real?
Stiles looked pale so he quickly reached out. "Are you hurt?!"
There was a shuddering, relieved breath escaping Stiles as he took Derek's hand to squeeze that hand. It felt much warmer than last night and that eased up some of the human's lingering worries. Letting it go, he half-turned on the bed to get a glass of water from the nightstand and offer it to Derek to drink slowly while he explained things.
"I'll be fine. I'm just a bit exhausted. Had to use a lot of magic last night," he shrugged it off (as usual). "But you are much better! Thank fuck..." he sighed again and murmured a silent prayer to the Universe or the powers above. "Those fuckers kidnapped you and took you to the Nemeton to stab you in the stomach with a sword and bleed you out on it. Jordan and I found you and took you to Deaton who helped keep you alive until Parrish and Melissa brought blood. Once you were stable, we came to the McCall house so they can keep an eye on us," Stiles summed it up.
"It was bad... I had nearly lost you for real this time..." he whispered, stroking Derek's chest through the cover then it curled into a fist around the comforter. "It was another of the Council's and Zepar's stupid tests!" he snorted, anger flickering in his eyes. "I wanted to kill all those cowards. I was so very pissed! I still am..."
So that explained the sword. And he nodded almost stupidly as he remembered more of what happened. He had been out for groceries, the bags were spelled and he had been out of it since then.
"I died," Derek whispered, remembering his reaper there and being out of his body, a few times. It wasn't exactly the first time for him to die, usually his body was quick to jumpstart again, pretty much the reason why his reaper was frustrated with having him as her charge, often summoned and never being able to fully reap. This was the first time though, that it happened to him while they were bonded. And that explained why Stiles looked the way he did.
"I'm sorry," Derek was quick to say as he put the glass away and reached for Stiles. If he'd lose Stiles, even for a moment, he'd lose it completely. And Stiles had to go through that. "You shouldn't have felt that." He worried for Stiles and what it had done to him, disliking that he hadn't been there, that he hadn't been able to prevent it from happening. The pain of losing a mate... it didn't compare to any physical injury. It came closest to drowning slowly from blood in your lungs while your chest exploded and your heart broke and your skin was impaled by thousands of shards. And Stiles, he had felt that.
"I was putting the bags in the car, there was a rune on the bag and I remember feeling really tired, drugged, kind of like Kanima poison but I couldn't even feel emotions. Zepar was there and a lot of hands, people with hoods, they were tugging at my clothes and there was somebody with the sword...." He could remember the pain he felt, but didn't say it, Stiles had felt it, there was no need to go there. His eyes widened as he realized what his mate just told him.
"The Nemeton... I bled out on the Nemeton. Stiles! They know! What did you do..? You didn't go after them by yourself?"
There was no need for Stiles to confirm that Derek had indeed died this time and bringing him back was hanging on a thread. If Stiles didn't get there in time... if he didn't have the magic... if he went after the fuckers instead of listening to Jordan...
"Yes, there was a rune on your body too which blocked the healing kicking in. That's why I had to bring you back with magic and break that rune before Deaton could help on you. We owe him a lot by now," Stiles let Derek pull him even closer then he sighed. "It seems they do know and we can expect someone to come back from the dead again. Deaton says that we have to keep that a secret because necromancy is very bad news and strictly forbidden. They might come back for us if they get hard proof," he shook his head, looking just as tired of this all like he felt.
"Oh, believe me, I wanted to go after them SO badly. They wanted to see if I was going to lose it and harness the Nemeton's powers which only got stronger with the fresh blood sacrifice. I was covered by them too – its magic and your blood. They planned it all out. Placing an unstable Spark right into the middle of the biggest temptation ever," he explained, not holding anything back from Derek because he promised and because Derek knew about his fears of the Nemeton and what it could do to him. "I was very close to giving in and murdering every single one of the hiding cowards. But Jordan and helping you snapped me out of it. Without you, though... I don't know what would've happened..." he whispered the end, forcing himself to relax his hand around the cover on Derek's chest.
There was so much pain and rage. There still was, boiling under the exhaustion and worry, feeding and triggering his Spark. So Stiles had to pay extra attention to anchor himself to Derek.
"Without me, you wouldn't have been pushed that far," Derek reassured even though that was a maybe because there was another weakness to Stiles, his dad. If he didn't have the Hale and the daughter, then he'd most likely snap if he lost the one parent left and having no anchor to fall back on. But that was thinking in ‘what ifs’ and that wasn't going to work, ‘what ifs’ from the past weren't going to happen and there was no need to use energy on them. The only ‘what ifs’ that counted were those needed to anticipate what could happen in the future. "What matters is that you didn't give in."
Stiles wasn't Jennifer. She had been solely chasing after the power of the Nemeton to fuel herself, she had been a darkness fully in her need for revenge since she was a young woman. Everything she had done were for her own gain, even seducing Derek had never been about wanting him, it had been about the fact that he was the key to the Nemeton, the one guardian she needed in her end plan. Everything Stiles did, it was for them, for the good of others.
"You won't give in, I know you. I know you have nightmares about Donovan when it was self-defense. I know you feel guilt for all that the Nogitsune did in your body when it was never you. You have regrets, you'd cry if you had to put an animal down. And even when possessed you knew how to reach me with a chess board. You're so much stronger than you think you are..." A thoughtful frown appeared on Derek’s face as he ran a soothing hand on his mate in an attempt to calm him down.
"She said she did it for the ‘overlooked’. The alpha pack happened when she was young, training to be a druid and Kali was her mate. What if the alpha pack in a way was a Council test? What if they have been pushing strong Sparks like you and her too far for too long and the ‘overlooked’ were all the druids falling victim to that?"
It would explain why this Council never bothered to stop her in her murdering rampage. She had failed their tests and she was bound to die anyways. Druids had often seemed like they weren't neutral, they often stepped in when it was for the good of the balance. Who decided that balance? Was what happened with Jennifer a result from tests because then all the innocent deaths had been 'allowed' for the sake of powering the tree? It was like every little puzzle piece fell into place.
"I think… you're already a Darach, and you never went dark as you were supposed to."
Derek's words felt good to the shaken up Spark and he also asked a few very good questions. But then his body went rigid in the embrace and against the wolf's body. The shock was evident in the widened eyes.
"W-what?" Stiles asked and swallowed hard as that last sentence sunk in. His first reaction was to immediately refuse even the possibility of that idea. But in a few seconds his clever eyes were already moving from side to side as his brain fired up. "I mean... that... kinda would make sense..." he finally admitted. "In general I think I qualify as a druid, but at the same time because of my strong connection to the Nemeton, I already have darkness in me..." he squirmed a bit uneasy. He really didn't like where his mind was going with this train of thoughts.
"Are you suggesting that basically the Council encourages creating darachs for some reason? Like powering up Nemetons or... dunno... triggering these 'darachs' in the name of 'balance'? That'd be quite fucked up, if you ask me. And if that's the case... with his connection to the Council... can we fully trust Deaton? What if he's involved somehow? Grooming me, powering me up for the Council's plans? Sure, in the past he didn't want to do that but things have changed. What if there's something in it for him too?" Stiles' face suddenly darkened.
During the months since his return, Deaton slowly managed to grow on him in a weird kind of way. Stiles was like an apprentice or protege to him. "He knows a lot about us. I... confided in him about many things... which he could've leaked out about me... us..." he frowned deeper. "I don't like that idea. And I don't know if it's something we should consider or it's just my paranoia talking from me. After all, we still don't know how Zepar and the hooded assholes knew such intimate details about us..."
"I know it's fucked up but think about it." Derek wasn't the first to have conspiracy theories. If anything, he hated to think along the lines of something being fate. However this was impossible to ignore, maybe dying gave him some clearer vision on it and talking like this was at least settling the unease in Stiles and it meant Derek didn't have to think about the very close brush with death. It was better to focus on what they could do instead of thinking about what happened, especially since the wolf had a tendency to brood.
"Peter and Deaton were there when Paige happened, even though I didn't know Deaton at the time. Paige was the start of all of this. Jennifer knew how to find me, she wanted to keep me and now we're bonded. We played right into everything they wanted to happen. I don't know why, but there's more going on here." Deaton helped them, yeah, because it wasn't in his interest not to. If Derek died for real, all of it would have been for nothing since Stiles wouldn't live for very long after that. "I don't think we can trust Deaton or his sister or Peter." It was possible that they were all in on it, or only one of them, but it wasn't something they knew so all of them had to be avoided.
"We need to look into Nemetons, their connections to druids and the real meaning of darachs. All this time our information came from limited sources. What if being a darach doesn't have to be a bad thing?" One thing didn't make sense though, Deaton hadn't stopped Stiles from wanting to do the ritual to block his magic, he had reluctantly helped him. Derek rubbed at his head, Stiles was better at this, at connecting everything, researching and then putting together this idea that hadn't been wrong often. Had Stiles been wrong before?
He tried to sit up but pretty much got nowhere, so he groaned instead, reminded of what his body had been put through. "Somebody is going to come back from the dead too." They didn't have time for this, what if it was Boyd or worse, somebody like Matt or Deucalion? It felt like they were in quicksand and the more they attempted to get out, the deeper they got into this mess.
"I agree with the notion that there's more going on here. There are pieces on the chess board we don't know the meaning of. Yet. But that mantra is right: the truth can't be hidden. It'll comes out eventually and I have to believe that we'll get answers to our questions. That we can solve this," Stiles nodded, already deep in thought, even if his brain was working slower than usual since he was still exhausted.
"I never trusted Peter or Morrell that much, for that matter. With Deaton... I could never fully read him and I think we'll have to be careful with him too. Too much is at stake here."
Watching his fingers picking on the cover on Derek's chest, Stiles hummed. "Yes, we have to dig deeper into Nemeton lore. I could dig and ask around a bit through some of my connections. And maybe... maybe I should go to my dad's house' attic. Mom mentioned that I should go through her stuff there. Maybe I can find something useful there..." he thought out loud but Derek's groan alerted him.
"Hey, where do you think you are going?" he asked, using that hand on Derek's chest to keep him down on the bed. "You're too weak for that yet. The magic is out of balance too. First we need to connect to heal and feel better," Stiles warned. They both needed that quite a bit. One just had to look at them. "Are you up for that?"
"I wanted to get out of bed because there's so much to do." But since the one hand of his mate kept Derek flat in bed with ease, there was no way they were leaving now. Wait, why were they in Scott's old room? He just now realized where they were, at the McCall house and they were wearing clothes he didn't recognize. Not answering Stiles just yet, he leaned in to sniff at the clothes. Chris. They were wearing Chris' clothes. He wasn't sure how he felt about that but there was no way they'd be able to wear Scott's old clothes, the true alpha was a short guy, even now.
The IV was in the way so he reached for it to tug it closer, fiddling with the little wheel to close the tube before pulling it out. His own healing was working fine again so no need for the extra boost. He was more tempted to put it in Stiles' arm instead, because he looked like he could use it. Then again he hadn't seen himself yet so maybe he shouldn't voice that thought out loud before it was thrown back in his face. He had died, Stiles nearly died because of that, they were allowed to feel and look like they were auditioning as ghosts for a horror movie.
"I'm ready for that. No...." Wait, there was still something sharp poking him in the neck so Derek pulled that one out as well, the wound closing as he kept his finger on it to not stain Melissa's bed sheets. He was pretty sure his blood had stained enough already. "Now I am." To him it was most important that Stiles was able to heal and he was sure that he could use some magic, or get rid of some of the magic with all the rage inside of him. Letting it build up was dangerous, especially now.
"Just... be careful. I don't know how a soul feels after near death and you're going to touch mine. Don't get tempted to stuff me full of magic when it's dimmer than usual. I always feel out of it for a few days after dying."
"I'll be careful, I promise..." Stiles gave Derek a small smile after watching him get ready for a different kind of infusion – the magical one. The magic was impatient, yes. It's been stirring and bubbling restlessly since Stiles had felt that excruciating pain through the bonds when they started hurting Derek. So it was eager for the connection being established again for the balancing.
Resting his head back on the pillow to watch his mate's reactions, he took Derek's forearm and pressed their runes together. Like for a while now, Stiles didn't have to utter any words anymore, the connection came to life in seconds. Maybe even a bit faster than usual. Perhaps they were already affected by the Nemeton's growing powers. Stiles wouldn't be surprised by that.
He focused his control on the magic, concentrating on not letting it rush into Derek like he felt it wanted to. Like a few times before after fixing the wolf's soul, he had to let it trickle through like a soothing stream of water. The moment it reached the ragged edges of the strained bonds, Stiles closed his amber eyes and sighed relieved. It was like spreading a healing balm on a too dry wound.
Behind his eyelids he could see the magic mending and healing the bonds with the help of Derek's own healing. It was fascinating to see and feel the two working together like a perfect team. And within half a minute he noticed that breathing became a bit easier and the tightness around his chest loosened a bit.
With how connected they were to the Nemeton, it seemed with its power getting stronger, so was their connection to one another. There wasn't even a pause when the two runes touched, the magic wanted to rush to him and Derek felt how Stiles was keeping it back so it wouldn't be too much of a shock. To him it wasn't the same as to his mate, mostly because he hadn't been awake long enough to feel the strain on their bonds in the same way, and everything felt too stretched, too thin, too fragile. The balancing helped that, it was like getting a massage on aching muscles, a balm on a burn, or a warm blanket on a cold body.
Stiles was instantly relaxing more, eyes closed while Derek watched him because he wasn't that interested in closing his eyes even though the lethargy pulled at the heavy eyelids to give in. His soul wasn't the only one that felt out of sorts. No wonder, it was a too close call for anybody's comfort. And yet, somehow he knew the intent hadn't been for him to die. They would have undone it, because they weren't done yet. Stiles was no good to them dead. If Derek died, so would the Spark and that was a fact.
The healing focused on leveling the magic between the two and to fix the bonds. There was nothing in Derek's body that wasn't healed yet physically, because Stiles had taken care of that and the sleep as well as the blood. By tomorrow his own blood was going to be working as it should, would have enough in his body by then and there was only going to be the mental component left. One that wasn't going to be much of a problem, for him. The strain was mostly on Stiles and the others because he hadn't been awake for it all.
This wasn't even a strain, this was so normal that it was mostly a relief for them both. Stiles was starting to look better so Derek finally closed his eyes as the ritual did it's work, as their souls connected in ways it never was going to be able to with others.
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