Sea of Sin
Sea Of Sin

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Useless-girl - Beam of Light series
Useless-girl - Beam of Light series : Chapter 10 - The Safest Place

Chapter 10 - The Safest Place

  2014.04.24. 20:07


Sometimes happiness doesn't come easy, but when everything falls into its place, the feeling can be overwhelming...


The 10th part of my “Beam of Light series”.
Recommended song: Sade – The Safest Place (The title and the quotations are from that song.)
Rating/category/pairing: NC-17, slash, supernatural elements, romance, angst elements, Adommy, Adam Lambert, Tommy Joe Ratliff


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The Safest Place


“In my heart
Your love has found
The safest hiding place
Inside is a field
And trees and a lake
Around is a wall
No-one from hell could break…”

Adam was lying on his side, head propped on his palm as his other hand was gently caressing Tommy’s naked back. His fingertips barely touched the white skin as he didn’t want to disturb his lover’s sleep. He knew that even if the guitarist’s insomnia got better since they were together, he still slept with difficulty. And besides he wanted to just enjoy the quiet and peaceful moments. It was far from dawn but the singer just couldn’t sleep from all the thoughts and emotions lazily swirling inside of him. He didn’t mind though. Sometimes he just liked to watch the blond sleep like this while he was thinking and feeling. He didn’t give a damn if it was a cliché. It made him satisfied knowing that Tommy was finally his. Ours.

Right. Adam knew that his shadow self too was satisfied with the turn of events and how Tommy reacted to him. The singer could never feel the Other this calm and cooperative before. Now he was less pushy and demanding because he knew that the one they wanted was theirs. Tommy loved them. And it was still kinda unbelievable to Adam. Sometimes he was afraid that it was just a dream and he’d wake up or Tommy’d change his mind and leave them. But the bottle blond seemed genuinely happy with both sides of Adam.

“In there you'll shine
In there you will cry
My heart has been a lonely warrior
Who's been to war
So you can be sure
In my heart your love has found
The safest hiding place…”

After all those long years keeping this to himself Adam gave up hope to find someone who’d be like this with him. Who’d accept him the way he was and wouldn’t want to change him into an image he was not. On Tommy’s side he could be himself. He only regretted that he let their insecurities keep them from getting here faster. But maybe it was with a reason. Adam never believed in coincidences so that had to be the explanation. The road was bumpy and painful but now here they were, lying in each other’s arms, in the safe bubble of their small world where they could bare their souls in front of the other. No masks, no doubts, just pure trust and love that was burning so bright sometimes that it blinded Adam and made him feel as if his flesh was burning off his bones. But it was so worth it.

Tommy was perfect. Adam never really understood how the blond couldn’t see that. But the singer loved him with his imperfections that came from his closed up nature. He didn’t mind that at times it was hard for the blond to open up and talk or show his emotions, he didn’t mind that he needed his space. Since they’ve got back from touring and Tommy practically moved in with Adam that wasn’t an issue anymore either, because Adam let Tommy lock himself up in the music room with his guitars for hours while he was going to interviews or meet up with friends and other people.

They were different but had a lot in common and it all just worked out, kept things interesting. He could never be sure what the pretty blond would say or do. The only thing he never ever doubted now was the deep love and connection they shared. He loved the calmness Tommy radiated and made sure that Adam didn’t burn himself to ashes. He loved to watch Tommy go pliant in his arms and under his kisses. He loved the comfortable silence between them that could last for hours while they were doing their own things. He loved how cute Tommy looked in his bigger sleeping clothes (when he had them on) and with his messy hair in the mornings. He loved making coffee for him. He loved the desire and love in his eyes when he looked at Adam. He loved the way he moaned Adam’s name. He loved all the small things he’d noticed about him since they were living together. They both gained a lot from this love – but most importantly they balanced each other. A lot of times when Adam was watching Tommy sleeping like this, he thought of him like his other half. What else could be the explanation to what they had?

Of course it wasn’t always moonlight and roses and at the beginning they needed some patience and time to get used to living with each other for real. Because it wasn’t like on a tour bus or hotel rooms anymore. No, it was much more. They weren’t fooling around anymore, they both were deadly serious about their relationship. It sometimes still amazed Adam how Tommy got over the fear of committing himself. The singer knew though that it was mainly because the blond’s previous relationships never worked out in the end because his partners didn’t figure him out – or at least didn’t understand his needs. Adam didn’t think that he’d figured Tommy out. No, there were still plenty to discover about him and the singer was taking his time. Because now they had time and they didn’t have to hide anymore either.

Everyone knew about them by now. Even the public. The reactions were mixed, but they didn’t expect anything else. They always knew there were people who supported them (even before they realized their own feelings for each other) and those who simply hated them for different reasons. Haters will hate, right? Not that they cared about such narrow-minded people. Not when what they felt for each other felt so real and deep. No one could touch that. Adam knew that he often acted like a love-struck fool, but he didn’t mind. Really, he was on cloud nine. Especially because Tommy was the only one who knew all about Adam and he accepted it. He loved him unconditionally and what would be a better reason to feel like this?

And he could never be grateful enough for that. And for staying with him through thick and thin, for coming over his fears, for always standing by his side (apart from those few painful months, of course) and for loving the Other too. He treasured Tommy’s love as if it was a fragile flower. He took care of it and let it bloom. It was his most valued possession. His career, his fame, the fans, the band, not even the music or his own voice could compete with it anymore. Adam couldn’t help himself, he had to lean to Tommy’s ear and softly sing in it:

“Your love's in a sacred place
The safest hiding place
My heart has been a lonely warrior before
Who's been to war
So you can be sure…”

He pressed a soft kiss against Tommy’s shoulder and the blush he saw made him smile. He heard him. Adam watched as his pretty man opened those soft brown eyes and smiled at him radiantly as he looked back over his shoulder. That smile right there was worth everything to Adam.

His soul was whole again.



The End



By: Useless-girl


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