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Chapter 39
2009.08.12. 15:20
39.
Dave tired not to see Mia’s face while he was doing love to his wife. But it was in vain. He concentrated hard to please Jennifer, who was clinging to him. She didn’t know but felt that there was more between her husband and Mia than just a few mind-blowing sexes. She loved her husband. She knew that he loved her too… But did Dave really love her? Dave rolled down from Jen – he wasn’t able to finish what he’d started. Jennifer started crying.
---
Finally we could laugh freely with Martin as we were sitting on the terrace, drinking tequila and smoking. It was so good to be alone with him, far from anything. Here we could finally pay attention to each other and we could relax.
“Thank you Marty for bringing me here. It was a great idea!”
“I’m glad that you finally feel happy, kitty.”
“I was thinking about disappearing a while too. It’s so peaceful here! It’s refreshing after the tour’s chaos. Finally we can pay attention to each other” I caressed his arm smiling. He interwove our fingers and looked back at me with a bit cloudy gaze.
“I wanted this too, I wanted you, Mia. We’ll make love the whole night long, you know this, right?”
“Uh-uh. It sounds great” I nodded and felt my body burning from this one sentence.
After the fifth drink Martin’s every inhibition vanished and my head was very light too. It was floating like colorful balloons. We said every kind of funny things and we were laughing hard – maybe we were a bit silly, but there was no one who could say anything against it.
Then something changed – it was a nice change. I felt it. He leant to me and kissed me tenderly. I felt the world spinning, but it wasn’t unpleasant, cuz his kisses didn’t let me feel bad. Slowly he explored every corner of my mouth then he pulled me onto his lap.
“Hey kitty, come here, now you’re just mine. There’s no black panther around to make a scene this time.”
“Yes Martin, I’m just yours during these two days. You know, I love you just as much as I love that silly Dave. Somehow you’re the more serious one. You two seem to be each others opposite.”
“He’s the burning swelter of the Sahara and I’m the cold iceberg, right?” he smiled, sliding his hands under my top.
“We can say, but I don’t think that you’re that cold now…” I reached down between his legs.
“Well, I’m not. You know the global warming…”
“I make you warm globally, come! Marty, do you want to do it here on the porch, under the starry night?”
“Oh yes, that’d be nice…” he grinned and pulled my top over my head with one swift move. He moaned “Oh god, Mia… I love it when you don’t wear any bra under your clothes… and I can feel you right away…” he sighed and squeezed my breasts, which made me sigh too. In return I loosened his belt and touched the middle of the heat between his thighs.
We leaped on each other hungrily, we didn’t care. It was from deep instincts, like mating animals. We got used to each other – he knew where to touch me, I knew what he liked. We were kissing fiercely. He pushed me against the banister and got rid off the remaining clothes which were still covering my body. I moaned from his hand’s profound work and I couldn’t wait to feel him inside of me.
“Come!” I groaned impatiently, while I put my legs around his waist as he turned with me and pressed me against the wall.
“I come, sweetie, I’m here…” he panted grabbing himself and leading his huge and hard cock into me. I had to cry out as I embraced his full length. There was only him for me in that moment.
“I love you Martin” I sighed into his ear as he accelerated his pace.
“Me too, kitty, I love you too!” he moaned then he had no strength to say anything else.
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Dave was sitting on the red couch of the living room, his head bent into his palms. He could hear even from here that Jen was still crying. He was sitting there in numb silence for a while. He stood up and went out to the balcony to light a cigarillo. He was shocked and anger and jealousy burned inside of him in the same time.
He was shocked from himself that he couldn’t wipe Mia out of his head, while he tired to make love to Jen. He was shocked that they just disappeared without a word, and only God knows where they went and what she does with Martin! He felt the anger rising inside of him again. It was useless to rage, he couldn’t pull out any information from Kessler, he just shrugged too without a clue. He inhaled the smoke nervously then exhaled it. The wind blew it away quickly.
He knew that he should comfort Jennifer now. He knew that Jen knew what’d happened. She saw another woman’s reflection on her husband’s face. It looks that she finally realised what was going on inside of Dave – that he loves that other one. She wasn’t sure whether he loved her at all or not. But she didn’t go out to the living room, she was too proud to do so, although her broken heart’s shards cut herself into pieces and inside she was whining from the pain she felt.
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We really made love all night long. We rode out our pleasure again and again until we were totally exhausted. After a nice shower – we were kissing it all along – we were just lying on the bed, nuzzling to each other. I was purring to my tom like a satisfied pussy cat, while he was caressing my arm gently.
“We should sleep now a bit” I yawned into my blonde prince’s face. As an answer he did the same. I took it as a yes and nestled myself between his arms. He pulled the blanket around us against the chill of the Sierras.
The sun was high on the sky when we woke up. My sweet fuzzy tiger made me a breakfast. I was smiling and I was grateful for his efforts. Well, I must say, it was a pilot breakfast. The result was somehow irregular, but he decorated nicely the gluey-like something, which’s colour I couldn’t name – and which we usually call an omelet – with slices of tomatoes and cucumbers. And the coffee was quite drinkable – if someone could overlook the slightly thick grounds at the bottom. But I pretended as if all these were made by the Ritz’s master chef. Even if my love’d put sawdust in front of me, I’d eat it without a word. I appreciated my dear one’s efforts. And Martin was like a little boy from this, who just got the red fire engine for Christmas. He had an ear to ear smile on his face and he touched me constantly. It was as if he wanted to be sure I was really there. And I was there. And I loved him. And he loved me. Do I need a better awakening?
---
But not everyone had such a nice awakening. Crowning his problems Dave awoke with a headache and sore throat. He had fever too and they had a concert tomorrow. He couldn’t force a word out of his throat – he completely lost his voice. He started to cry. He was always terrified from this. His voice, his voice! And because they were touring around the world now, he needed it more than anything. He wrote down to Jen what was the problem and to call Kessy immediately.
After telling him the situation, a doctor took care of Dave. He was lying alone in a hotel room, cuz Jen said that she needs some fresh air. He felt himself awfully alone and frightened because of his voice. There was no one to nuzzle to. And all of this because of his selfishness and sentimentalism! He was crying without a noise like a little boy, huddled up in bed. And he just wanted his mother to caress his forehead, telling a tale to him to chase the pain away.
He fell asleep and he saw a dream. He saw himself on stage as he’s standing there. The music is on and he tries to enter the song with his voice in the right place in vain, cuz he has no voice. He sees as Martin and Mia looks at him then the others too. His audience is in front of him and he’s just standing there ashamed. Then he leaves the stage like a beaten army, hearing that Martin announces the end of the concert.
He woke up sweating hard, panting from his nightmare. But the reality wasn’t better either. Jen left to have some fresh air. No wonder. She was very hurt from the thing which had happened between her and Dave. Her tears started falling again. Dave was crying too, lying on the bed, hiding his face in his hands. He was crying without a voice. He was voiceless.
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We decided with Martin that we’ll just loll about if we were in such a beautiful place. I’ve found a smaller rucksack. I put some sandwiches and some mineral water in it and we headed towards the mountain behind the house. It wasn’t a difficult surface and it didn’t bother us to climb a bit. We were just walking hand in hand and we were talking about this and that. Martin was talking about his family and his relationship with his children, whom he loved very much then about his thoughts in different topics. Finally I felt that after a long while I could open up myself. We were talking about our relationship, about Dave and the whole tour, about Depeche Mode and music.
When we reached the top we were panting a bit by a resting-place and were admiring the sight. Then we sat down onto a trunk and ate some sandwiches.
“You know, sometimes I still ask myself who was its father” I noted, but my voice didn’t fail me anymore. Finally I could talk about it, seeing things from a distance.
“Well it’d have been unsure even with a test. But we surely would have done a test when the baby was born. But to tell the truth Mia, I don’t think that next to all our problems we’d need a baby too. Things are so running into one another that when something happens to one of us, the same thing happens to the other two. Do you take the birth pills now?”
“No, not yet. I’ll meet that gynecologist whom Laura, the stylist advised. It is said that he knows what he’s doing.”
“Hmm, alright. Kitty, let’s check whether there’s any signal. Maybe we’ll have it up here. Mia, I miss David so badly, maybe we can reach him.”
“Okay, let’s call him!”
“It rings out. Dave, pick it up” he murmured. A click then Mart heard snuffling, moaning and suppressed, blurred voices. “What the hell? Is their dog playing with the phone again?” His phone beeped – he’s got a message. “Oh, dear! No, please don’t!” Mart exclaimed with a frightened expression.
“What’d happened?” I asked worried.
“We must go back immediately!”
“But what’s it? Something happened to Dave?”
“Yes. He’s sick and he lost his voice. Completely!”
“Ohmygod!” I covered my mouth with my hand.
“This is very dangerous by him. It’d happened a few times before and he psyches out every time. He has nightmares and he’s awfully scared that he’ll stay like this.”
“Let’s go back right away!” I jumped up “Oh god, we shouldn’t have left him there like this!” I started blaming myself immediately as I packed our stuff and we hurried down the mountain.
---
I didn’t dare to go in because of Jen, but Mart went into his room. He was lying on the bed dead pale in lethargy. There was a thick scarf around his neck over his white T-shirt. He still had a fever, although it wasn’t as high as earlier. But his vocal cords failed him. The doc forbade him even whispering. There was a notebook and a pen next to him – his only connection to the world. When Mart sat next to him, he put his head onto Curly’s lap without a voice. By that time Marty suspected that Jen went home or she wasn’t around. He was wondering what could have happened between the two of them, cuz usually Jen was by her husband’s side in such situations. Maybe it was an urgent work-project, which can occur – she was in the middle of organizing a film festival now anyway – or maybe they had a bad fight. Mart sighed and took his love’s face between his hands. He nuzzled to him like a puppy, nestling to his touch.
“Please don’t be mad, love, we didn’t want it like this. I’m sorry” Martin said “We shouldn’t have left you alone. But now we’re here” Dave mouthed my name “She’s outside too, don’t worry. Everything’ll be fine. Your voice’ll come back. We’ll help you. We’ll heal you” he whispered, looking into his eyes, which were watery.
David reached for his note book and slowly – like someone who writes his last words, suffering from a lethal illness – wrote: ‘I want to see her.’
Mart stood up and called me in. I ran into the room and fell upon his neck, pressing my face to his, kissing him wherever I could reach him. I sobbed into his neck and I was hugging him so tightly, that our poor guy nearly started coughing between my arms.
“I love you, you fool! I love you, I love you so much!” I repeated still sobbing and felt his warm hand stroking my back, while he was hugging me back.
He leant back a bit and put one of his hand onto his heart then onto mine and nodded, smiling ungainly. My feelings were so overwhelming that I can’t remember what I’ve told him sobbing, sniffling and sometimes wiping my teary face into his T-shirt.
When we calmed down a bit, Martin asked what’d happened and where Jenny was. Dave wrote down that she disappeared in the morning after telling Kessler about his condition then he wrote down that the cause of it was that he was thinking of me during making love to Jenny and he couldn’t please her because of this. I asked him what we will do now. He just shook his head telling us that he doesn’t know and sighed. We couldn’t do much more than giving him the steroids, waiting them to start working. We should cancel tomorrow’s show, I thought. Mart had this same thought cuz he called Kessler and started speaking while I buried myself into Dave, hugging him so tightly that I nearly choked him.
He freed one of his hands and wrote: ‘It’s good to have you two here!’
“And I’m happy to be here and that you don’t hate us. I missed you, you big jerk!” I embraced him then let him pull back a bit so he could run his thumb on my lower lip.
he mouthed and I smiled and closed my eyes, letting him give a featherlike kiss onto my lips.
‘I love you’
Martin announced that they didn’t cancel the show yet, just postponed it with 3 days. We’ll see what’ll happen. But because we had a few days off after this concert, this won’t be a problem. Near the end of the tour we needed more breaks.
“There’s not much left, Dave. We’ll heal you and we’ll be able to do the rest easily” I smiled at him and caressed his face.
In this very moment Jennifer stepped into the room. Martin noticed her first, who was sitting next to us on the bed. It was barely visible when Jennifer shivered then she came to the bed, stopping close to me “May I?” she asked.
My heart was pounding hard in my chest and I swallowed. I couldn’t say a word so I just nodded and stood up after letting Dave go. The tense silence was nearly palpable in the room. Then I don’t know what’d happened afterwards, cuz I turned around and left the room quietly. I was pacing on the corridor from wall to wall in my nervousness. I nearly went crazy, cuz I didn’t know what was going on inside, although I knew that I had no right to be there.
---
But Martin stayed there, pulling back to the foot of the bed and was watching Jen with Dave. She took the thermos, poured some tea without a word and gave it to Dave with his pills. Mart saw how upset and tired her moves were. Dave took the pills without protesting, watching his wife.
“She’s the one, isn’t she?” Jennifer looked into Dave’s eyes “You’ve stopped yesterday because of her, right?” Dave nodded. “Do you love her?” she asked on a shaky voice. Dave nodded again. “Do you leave me, Dave?” she cried.
Dave shook his head and took his wife’s hands into his then he reached for his notebook and wrote: ‘No, unless you decide otherwise. Loving her doesn’t mean that I don’t love you anymore.’
Jen read it and didn’t know what to think. Should she be happy that she won’t lose her husband, or should she be angry because she has to share him? There was sad pain in her eyes as she was sitting there voiceless. She never thought that one day they’ll face such a situation. Of course she knew that sometimes Dave cheated on her, they’d discussed this once. But she never thought that once he’ll fell in love with one of his lovers! But she couldn’t do anything against it, she was just sitting there – her head bent – watching her fingers resting between Dave’s and she was crying inwardly. Then after a while she let him go and walked out of the room.
---
I was chewing my nails when I turned towards the door, but I froze immediately when I saw Jen. When she spotted me, her face hardened and started walking into my direction. I didn’t know what to do, I was still frozen to the ground. And this is why I was taken short when her hand swung and she smacked me in the face. I just put my hand on my face and gawped.
“You deserved this” he said on an ice-cold tone “It’s one thing that I have to share him with oh thousands of people, but I won’t let you take away my husband completely. If you hurt him or if you cause any pain for him, you’ll have to deal with me!” she looked deeply into my eyes then stormed towards the elevator. I was staring after her shocked, still holding my red face, where slowly her fingers came visible on my skin.
---
Martin was just sitting on the edge of the bed and he was thinking what to do next then he decided to call me in as the next step. I came into the room reluctantly and stopped in front of them with the red marks of the five fingers on my face. Dave looked at me shocked, Martin was rather worried.
“Well… she left” I noted on a light tone as I clasped my hands “Dave, honey, did you take your meds? Do you want something to drink?”
First he nodded then shook his head. He quickly reached for his notebook and started writing – looking up at my face time after time.
he wrote with abrupt letters. I didn’t want – I couldn’t – answer, but when he shook my hand to force me to speak, I slowly nodded. ‘I will talk to her!’ the next message came as he held up the notebook angrily and a bit shocked.
‘Jen hit you?’
“No, Dave, it isn’t necessary. I’ve deserved what I’ve got. No problem. Really” I answered folding my arms.
He shook his head and wrote: ‘If there’s someone who deserved a hit then it’s me, her husband, cuz without me this wouldn’t happen, would it? How did she dare to hit you? I’ve never hit her!’
“Dave, of course you never hit her! In my eyes that’s an unforgivable sin” I answered “She had the right to hit me, cuz she loves you and she sees just the bitch in me, the rival, and I can’t blame her for this. I deserved what I’ve got. And I’d have deserved more, if she decided to give me more. Let’s see the facts, Dave… I’m just an occupied lover and a vocalist here and you two are burning for me now. But until when? It’s not that I wouldn’t enjoy every single minute with you two, cuz I love both of you very much. But I’m nobody here. And I’m nobody especially in your marriage. I shouldn’t have had anything to do with that. Jen has rights as your wife. She could do this to me, cuz she had right to do this because she’s hurt and she wants to protect her marriage. Dave, she loves you very much and she’s jealous. Please, don’t be mad at her.”
He was just looking at me, he wanted to say something, he grabbed his pen again to write, but I stopped his hand.
“No. Please, leave it this way, okay? Don’t make a big deal of this.”
His mouth formed a ‘but’.
“Dave, please. I don’t want to talk about this anymore. I’ll survive. The main point here is to see you healthy again, am I right Marty?” I turned to Curly, who was immersed into his thoughts.
“Exactly. Dave, we really have to concentrate on putting things right in the fastest way. I spoke to the doc, who said that if we take care, your vocal cords will be okay in a few days time. Until then we’ll postpone the concerts. No, Dave, we can’t do anything else. You can’t sing with hoarse voice and aching throat, you know it well.”
“Exactly” I joined the conversation “I’ll make you a nice hot tea, okay? Which kind do you like?”
‘I don’t want any tea, I don’t need anything’ he wrote ‘It was too much for today. I want to sleep.’
We nodded with Martin, stepped to him, gave him a hug and a peck onto his face and pulled his blanket up to his chin. He blinked at us gratefully and waved after us when we stepped out of the room.
---
Outside I buried myself between Martin’s arms right away, hiding my face in his chest. I was embracing him tightly and I was inhaling his scent.
“Hey, kitty… what’s it?”
“It scares me like hell seeing him like this! Voiceless!” I confessed.
“Take it easy, relax, it’ll pass. We have to be patient. Let him rest now, sleeping always helps.”
“We should make him an awful drink with honey and onions – my grandma used to do it. Do you want to come down to the kitchen with me? Help me. I know this’ll help him.”
“Sure kitty. We need anything which can help him. And tell me how’ll you make him drink it?”
“I have my ways” I smiled at him “He’s not the only one who can manipulate people, you’ll see.”
“I have no doubts about your manipulating skills” he kindly stroked my butt while we headed for the kitchen “If this stuff you want to do really helps him then my belief that grandmas knew something will be stronger” he finally smiled.
“My granny knew something, that’s for sure. I never had to take pills. At least in my childhood” I murmured the last sentence quietly.
Martin took my hand and asked softly: “And are you okay? Are you still taking the tranquilizers?”
“No, I don’t take those. Just the ones Dave endorsed with the crew-doc. But to tell the truth Martin, now maybe I drink more and it seems more regularly. Dave doesn’t know it of course.”
“Don’t think that he doesn’t suspect it. And I know that you drink more, cuz you do it with me. We must be careful not to drink too much. Maybe I’ll drink less if I have to take care of you.”
“It’s rather funny. Two boozy takes care not to let the other drink too much…” I made a mouth, while I prepared the ingredients for Dave’s drink.
“Ironical, yes.”
“And what should we do instead? Making love all days long?” I asked as a joke.
“I was thinking about something like that, yes” he ran his hand on my body as we were standing in the hotel’s kitchen and I put the onion’s scale into the boiling water. I put a bucket of ice onto the counter so later I’ll be able to cool the infusion to the right temperature. “And I’ll take care of you, although I know this’ll be more difficult for me than it’d be to someone else. Mia, I want to stop drinking. Things aren’t good this way. I don’t want to die, I don’t want to lose you two!”
“See Martin? I like this approach of yours way better!” I turned my head to him with a little smile on my face “And that you want to take care of me feels very good. That both of you want to take care of me and I hope, you’re not judging me because of my stupid things” I turned back to the onions.
When the drink was ready and the temperature was perfect, I asked the chef whether they have pine-honey. They had. I asked with a bottle and we went back to Dave. I quietly looked into the room, cuz I didn’t want to wake him up. He wasn’t sleeping yet.
“Sweetheart, can we come in? We don’t want to keep you up for too long. I just brought some homemade medicine. I think it’s better than the pills.”
Dave struggled himself up to a sitting position and nodded. He adjusted the thick scarf on his neck.
“First take a spoonful of the honey then drink the whole stuff with one gulp. It isn’t that bad.”
Dave did like that. He grimaced and sighed then cleared his throat.
‘Stay with me, if you don’t have better things to do’ he wrote ‘I can’t sleep.’
Learning from the previous happenings I stepped to the door and locked it then we lay down next to him from both sides. And we were just laying there in silence then I’ve started crooning while I was caressing his covered chest. Because he couldn’t say a word – and we didn’t want to break the silence – he fell asleep quickly from exhaustion and maybe because of my crooning. As I looked up, I saw that Martin was at the edge of falling asleep too, so I went on with my crooning for a while. When I knew that they were surely asleep, I carefully climbed out of bed and walked to my purse then closed the bathroom’s door behind me. I examined my face – luckily there was no sign of Jen’s fingers there – then I shook two pills into my palm. My chest was aching again.
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