It’s No Good
By: Rawiya

“Why didn’t yoo jus say that yoo and Roger Taylor were dating instead of denyin…”

”Gore, it doesn’t make a bit of difference because it is none of yor business…” Nick said with disgust.

“Rhodes, yoo liked wot I did, yoo liked wot occurred between us…” I said staring into the beautiful greens.

“Wot does it matter anyway? Even if he did like it, he would not leave me for the likes of yoo. Now, why did yoo come back in here anyhow?”

“Wait, wait, wot is that supposed to mean?” My eyes narrowed; I had just been insulted by the most unlikely of persons, Roger Taylor.

“It means, exactly as I stated, he would not leave me for yoo, Martin Gore.” Roger put his hands on Nick’s shoulders, massaging them tightly.

“Look Mr. Gore, please leave my premises or I will call the authorities to have yoo removed. I told yoo there was nothin’ left to discuss…”

Still wondering what Roger was insinuating by his comment, I backed away. However, I would make sure I left a lasting image in the brain of Nick Rhodes, a person I had fancied seemingly forever.

In the back of my mind, I knew that he enjoyed that connection just as much as I did. This situation was much like the one I had with Dave and his estranged jealous admirer that he had years ago.

Nonetheless, here I was trying to begin something new between the intelligent tart and myself. I had taken his friendship and used it as a way to be closer to him. Now, with Dave chasing after John Taylor, I needed someone to call my own.

‘Patience is needed in this instance…’

I walked up to him and like a car changing directions, I quickly planted a kiss on his lips before sprinting out of the house.

Before anything else could be said, I jumped in my automobile, starting it to move out of Nick’s driveway.

“Shit on me…I would have neva guessed Roger Taylor to be a bender…” I said softly to myself.

Indeed it was a shock to see the two of them inside of each other’s arms, embracing. Especially since I had known the tarts to be careful about the way they looked at each other, the pictures they taken together; they were always so concerned with their image, not wanting to appear gay.

Us, on the other hand, did what we wanted. There were many photos that could have been misconstrued, but we didn’t care, we have always done things our own way.

‘What did Roger mean by, the likes of you?’

That last comment was still emblazoned in my brain. I did not like it; did not appreciate what he could have been trying to say about me.

‘Guess I know how Nick feels about the stupid things we used to say.’

As I came closer to my flat, my cell rang.

“Allo.”

“Mart, yoo will not guess who is here.” It was Dave’s voice on the other end, he was actually the last person I wanted to hear from right now.

Rolling my eyes, “Enlighten me, who…” I said, touching the volume on my Bluetooth.

“Fuckin’…” Dave screamed at the top of his lungs making me wince.

At Dave’s Building…

“Yes, yes that is wot I said. Wot, wot do yoo mean? Yoo ar jus as much to blame for that row we had years ago as I am. If the two of yoo weren’t dickin’ around…” I said with a scowl.

Martin was in a foul mood; I guess his is still upset about my desire for John Taylor.

“Look Mart, I’m not sure wot the hell he is doin here but…”

“Dave wot kind of company ar yoo, come out here and out of the bedroom please,” Jennifer yelled from the living room.

“Damnit, I gotta go, I’ll speak to yoo later…” I said quickly before pushing the disconnect button.

‘Fuck, why now, why tonight…’

I got up from the bed, slinging the phone across the mattress.

Someone, who I thought would never come back into my life, was in my front room, talking with my wife. Why this, on a day that I would most likely cherish forever; the day I finally informed the man who I had the most desire for, that I wanted him, loved him.

He was the last person I wanted to see at this point. That argument we had over Martin was stupid to begin with.

Moreover, it was his fault, he should not have been fooling around with Martin in the first place; Martin was always mine and he knew it.

I know he did it to spite me, he always had that jealous bone in his body about the relationship that Mart and I had. The fucker was so envious of us that he ruined a really good thing; that was something I could never forgive him for.

‘And now, he is in my house, smilin’ like a Cheshire cat…’

As if nothing occurred between us years ago.

Well, if he thinks that this is time to patch things up and let bygones be bygones, it will be his mistake.

‘Fucker…’

While I continued to brood over the unfortunate arrival of that individual, my phone sang the tune that I had downloaded just yesterday to be part of my collection. Now, it was the ringtone of my lover to be.

“Such a good lover, you make me cry…” Like an idiot, I sat there listening to it wail some more, only because I wished for my desired tart, to one day, sing it to me.

Before it said another note, I pressed the green button. “Allo, gorgeous…”

John’s voice was on the other end, I had not called him back earlier so this was the perfect time to speak to him.

“Yes, of course, I was thinking about yoo, I’m sorry I had to let yoo go so abruptly earlier, yoo know that the wife was in the room, questioning…wot was that?” As if I were a teen girl on the phone talking to her first crush, the smile on my face was huge.

“Oh, John. Yeah, the kiss is still lingerin’ on my mind, mate. Jus the thought of wot I could do to yoo, makes somethin’ come alive down below, my love…”

By the tone of his sexy voice, I could tell he was just as excited about our meeting as I was.

‘I had convinced him that we needed this…’

Blushing, I leaned back on top of the sheets, closing my eyes to let my mind wander. John was saying some things that were making my perfectly fitted slacks feel rather uncomfortable.

Right now, my mind was in another place, away from the hell that had been thrust upon me. With that fool in my living space, I needed to think of something more positive; another vision of John in bed with me was appropriate.

The laugh that came through the other end made me picture that smile that could be seen for miles. John always had the most beautiful grin. So damn sexy, his happy expression was a thing of loveliness.

And now, as an older man with all the crinkles and such, he was even more attractive.

“Uh huh, I see. So, would yoo want to meet at that pub and then maybe go for a drive?” I wanted to get him alone, leaving the bar would be the only way.

“Should I trust yoo, Gahan, I mean, trust that yoo won’t do anything more than wot I want or expect…” John said loudly through my cell.

Amused, I chuckled at his statement. “Well of course yoo can trust me. I mean yoo no harm, unless yoo wanted me to do that in the most loving of ways…”

John giggled at the close of my sentence. As crazy as it sounded it was true. I wanted him, needed him and would treat him with the most loving care despite the fact that there was no evidence of how I felt. I did not make it known to the world, in my mind, I did not have to.

The only people that had to be aware of my feelings was the two of us. What good would it do to involve other people into this affair we were trying to have?

Just as in the case with that person and Mart, telling people of your intentions does nothing but create problems. Martin, like an idiot, told…him, that we had feelings for one another. That was the most stupidest thing to do too.

I will never know why my lover of twenty plus years would do such a thing. I have always known Martin to be more sensible and seemingly, many times he had proved me wrong.

However, how rational are people when they want someone, when they claim to care? At this point I had thrown everything out the window, not taking anything into consideration as far as the consequences that may occur after getting cozy with my pop tart. Really at this point, I don’t give a fuck.

Even better, by this conversation we are having, he was not concerned either, which was a surprise. I thought that LeBon would have scared him into submission; he seems like that type of personality.

Moreover, it seemed John was running into my arms right where I wanted him to be. Maybe when I forced myself upon him, when our worlds collided, it made him think about what a good relationship we could have.

John did not have to tell me all I wanted to hear because I had already made up my mind that I would wait for him. I had for the better part of three decades to even, tell him how I felt so I would be patient.

‘John Taylor would be mine despite what anyone knew or thought…’

At this juncture, I was not even sure if I were afraid of what my lovely Jenny knew. She was so understanding, we could work things out.

“Ah, John, yoo know…it warms my heart that yoo see wot I was trying to tell yoo. I can’t wait to see yoo tomorrow, to get yoo alone, away from that thing yoo call a man and into my arms, a real one….” I said with a grin.

Once I angled to sit upright…

“Who is the John yoo cannot wait to see tomorrow…”

I did not even turn around, he was behind me. I did not want to look into that face anymore than I needed.

‘Shit…’

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